Nick Peron

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Iron Man #255

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Credits

Two seemingly unrelated events are happened on two different points of the globe that will have an effect on the lives of two men.

At a military complex in the city of Khimky, the Crimson Dynamo is about to undergo a training session with the new Devastator in order to determine which is the more powerful.[1]

Across the world, Iron Man has caught a trespasser on the Stark Enterprises compound. He is a bizarre man in wearing a costume that was cobbled together from sporting gear and consumer electronics. From a radio headset attached to his helmet this intruder — who calls himself Freak Quincy — is picking up transmissions from many sources and spouting nonsense. When Iron Man tries to stop him he discovers that Quincy’s hairdryer isn’t harmless but can emit a frequency that messes with his armor.

This is when things get weird: Devastator draws his energy blasts from a satellite orbiting in space. Needing to draw more power he increases the connection just as Freak Quincy’s headset connects to the satellite. This causes a link between the two men. When they simultaneously blast the Crimson Dynamo and Iron Man it causes the two armored individuals to swap bodies. Tony Stark is disorientated to find himself in the Crimson Dynamo’s body that he is knocked out by Devastator. Meanwhile, Shatalov realizes that he is now in Iron Man’s body. Using the suit’s repulsons to blow off Freak Quincy’s arms, he claims to security arriving on the scene that Quincy had taken control of his armor and was suicidal.

When Stark later wakes up in the hospital he is still in the body of Valentin Shatalov, the current Crimson Dynamo pilot. He is greeted by Lieutenant Colonel Yelena Brement, Shatalov’s lover. In order to explain his lack of memory and poor Russian, Tony explains that he is having memory problems to cover for the fact that he isn’t really Shatalov. Yelena apparently buys this and tells “Valentin” that they’ll just have to get reacquainted with themselves. As she takes “Valentin” home, she hands him the armor matrix that allows him to change into the Crimson Dynamo. Along the way, Tony wonders what happened to Dimitri Bukharin the man who previously wore the Dynamo armor.[2] Once inside, Yelena excuses herself to the bathroom and comes out in some sexy lingerie in an effort to coax “Valentin’s” memories. She does succeed in turning Tony on and takes that as a sign that he is remembering who he really is.

Meanwhile, Shatalov-in-Stark’s body is at the hospital where a surgeon tells him that Freak Quincy will survive but will be in unconscious for hours. Using the Iron Man armor’s navigation system, Shatalov makes his way back to Tony Stark’s mansion. Once inside, Valentin takes off Iron Man’s helmet and learns that the hero is actually Tony Stark, something that hardly surprises him.

The following morning, Tony wakes up still disorientated from the concussion suffered in his new body. When Yelena comes in with breakfast, he tells her that he needs to get back to the training facility and figure out what’s going on.

At that same time, Shatalov arrives at Stark Enterprises and tells Bambi Arbogast — Tony’s administrative assistant — to get all the company’s current contracts and bring them to his office right away. He then starts accessing Tony’s personal computer to see what military secrets he can learn from its archives.

As Shatalov is learning the secrets to everything from military hardware, to Quinjet technology, to the lost secrets of the Iron Man armor, Tony has Yelena help him break into the computer database in the Russian facility. Once she gives him access to one of the computers, he knocks her out with a flick of a finger of the Crimson Dynamo armor so he can make a call out to Shatalov. Moments later, Bambi Arbogast informs “Tony Stark” that he has an overseas call from a “Valentin Shatalov”. Valentin answers the call, Tony proposes that they work together to undo the body swap. However, Valentin has no interest of doing the sort for the time being and is unphased when Tony tries to bluff him into thinking he’ll hurt Yelena if he doesn’t cooperate. Shatalov then hangs up the phone and gets back to the classified files on Tony’s computer. He decides that whatever he can’t steal, he’ll sabotage in order to cripple Stark Enterprise operations.

Deducing what Shatalov might do to his business, Tony tries one last hope at getting his body back: He tries communicating with Freak Quincy directly via radio. This works and he manages to convince him to reach out with his mind and try and incapacitate Shatalov to prevent him from doing any damage. Annoyed by this interference, Valentin crawls over to Tony’s attaché case so he can put on Iron Man’s armor and deal with Quincy once and for all.

By this time, Tony has figured out that Devastator played a part in the body swap and orders him to hit him with everything he has. This is at the exact moment when Shatalov arrives in Quincy’s room. A link between Quincy and Devastator is made in the nick of time, allowing Tony successfully swap bodies again. As Shatalov tries to make sense of what just happened, Yelena arrives with some soldiers and puts the Crimson Dynamo under arrest. Valentin is impressed with Tony’s victory but vows that next time he won’t be so lucky.

Tony, meanwhile, is back in his own body and has discovered that this latest body swap has suffered a hemorrhage in the process. Tony contemplates killing Quincy in order to prevent something like this from happened again but can’t bring himself to do it. Instead, he intends to use his vast resources to help train him to cope with his bizarre abilities instead.

Recurring Characters

Iron Man, Crimson Dynamo, Devastator, Bambi Arbogast

Continuity Notes

  1. Both of these men are new comers to these identities:

    • The Crimson Dynamo is later identified later this issue is Valentin Shatalov. In Soviet Super-Soldiers #1 he succeeded his predecessor was Dimitri Bukharin who retired from the role to take on the identity of Airstrike in the same issue.

    • The original Devastator was Kirov Petrovna, who died battling the Hulk in Incredible Hulk #186. This successors full name is Gregori Larionov as revealed in Iron Manual Mark 3. He first took on this roll in Rom #44.

  2. I already explained this above. Tony fought Bukharin as Iron Man back in issue #109.

Topical References

  • Here, Russia is referred to as the Soviet Union. This should be considered a topical reference as the USSR dissolved a year after this story was published.

  • Given Freak Quincy’s constant connection to all manners of broadcasts most of the guys slogans are commercial jingles and pop-culture references that were popular at the time this comic book was published in 1990. They should all be considered topical because they are dated and/or real world products or people. They include:

    • Quincy sings the chorus to “Channel Z” by the B-52s from their 1989 album Cosmic Thing.

    • He references the Geraldo Rivera Show a daytime talkshow that wrote the book on “Trash TV” that ran from 1987 to 1998.

    • “The Choice of a New Generation” was a slogan used by Pepsi cola in the 1980s and early 90s. This was a part of an ad campaign to show that Pepsi was the cool and hip alternative to Coca-Cola. It featured celebrity endorsements from Michael Jackson.

    • CNN Headline News: Is a sister station to CNN, originally called CNN-2 when it began in 1982 it later rebranded to CNN Headline News. It is now better known as HLN.

    • “Pop open a can of Jolt and watch the fireworks begin!” Was the slogan to Jolt Cola at the time this story was published. This brand of double-caffeinated soft drink has been off the market since 2009. Although it did experience a short-lived revival between 2017 and 2019.

    • He sings the chorus to “Oh What a Feeling” by Crowbar from their 1970 album Bad Manors

    • “Transformers! Robots in Disguise!” Was the commercial jingle for the Transformers toyline produced by Hasbro.

    • “the pain reliever that doctors prescribe the most” is a tag line that was (and still is) used in commercials for pain relievers like Tylonol and Advil.

    • While in the hospital he recites the opening narration for the TV show The Six-Million Dollar Man.

    • “Two mints in one!” is the old slogan for Certs breath mints.

    • He references the Smothers Brothers comedy duo. These guys were on TV on and off over the years with TV shows that ran from 1965 to 1975.

    • “Frankly Mr. Trebek, I’m stumped!” This is in reference to former Jeopardy host Alex Trebek, who was the face of the gameshow from 1984 until his death in 2020.

    • Pop Goes the Weasel a traditional British nursery rhyme that first appeared in 1825.

    • His dying words are lyrics from “Time is on my Side” covered by the Rolling Stones in 1964. It appears in their album Rolling Stones No. 2.

  • Tony Stark is depicted as having a computer in his office that has a CRT monitor. This should be considered a topical reference as this is an obsolete technology.