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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Avengers #188

Avengers #188

Elementary, Dear Avengers

After the Avengers rescued Quicksilver and the Scarlet Witch from the demon Chthon, the team is heading home. Their first stop is the Inhuman’s hidden city of Attilan to drop off Quicksilver. There he is happily reunited with his wife, Crystal, who announces that she is pregnant with their child.[1] This brings happiness among everyone, although the Inhumans are concerned about the disappearance of Medusa.[2] Hearing about Crystal’s pregnancy, Wanda wonders about her own capacity to have children since she is married to an android.[3] Heading for home, Wanda reports back to the Vision who is happy to hear that she is safe and that she will be home soon. That’s when she notices the Beast leafing through the Darhold and blasts it out of his grasp with a hex bolt. She warns him that the mystical book can steal the souls of those who read it.

As they continue their voyage, the Wasp points out the fastest route back to America will take them over Russian airspace, raising concerns about how they will react to the Avengers. Soon, Russian fighter planes catch up with the Quinjet and order them to state their business. Luckily, the Beast speaks fluent Russian and is able to explain their situation to the fighter pilots.[4] Suddenly, one of the jets is shot out of the sky, prompting the other jets to go after the source. The Avengers debate on getting involved, given the complex diplomatic issues between Russia and the United States. Most of the Avengers want to help, pointing out that they are recognized by the United Nations. Captain America decides to radio Henry Gyrich, their NSA liaison, but Ms. Marvel secretly sabotages their communicator, knowing that Gyrich would refuse to let them get involved. As they follow the the other fighters to a nearby atomic power plant, the Falcon is annoyed that nobody asked for his opinion, making him once again question his purpose on the Avengers outside of filling a government quota.

When they land the Quinjet they are surrounded by Russian soldiers, until one of their older commanders orders them to stand down, remembering how Captain America fought alongside Russia to defend their country from the Nazis during World War II. As the Avengers attempt to enter the facility, they are all attacked by a massive creature made entirely out of the element of Vanadium. The Avengers fight back and when Wonder Man shatters their attacker’s body, they discover that the creature was comprised entirely of the element. Inside, they find a bunch of other sentient Elements: Carbon, Phosphorus, Chlorine, and Radium. Apparently, an accident within the reactor brought them to life and they are now using the technology found here to turn humans into the embodiments of other elements.

A battle soon breaks out, but when Chlorine starts trying to fill the room with the deadly gas it is made out of, the Avengers are forced to evacuate. However, the Falcon sees the deadly gas has dissipated and decides to go back and prove his value to the Avengers but ends up getting captured instead. Outside, the Avengers see a number of Russian soldiers going through the Quinjets to try and learn its secrets and fight them off. That’s when the Wasp returns from inside and informs them that the Elements of Doom have captured the Falcon. She also explains how she saw the creature turn one of the plant workers into a creature made entirely cobalt. Taking an experimental laser off of a tank, the Avengers race inside. After rescuing the Falcon, Ms. Marvel uses the laser to slice open the molten reactor core. The molten material slays the creatures. Wonder Man then punches a hole to the surface so they can escape.

They soon find themselves under fire by some ungrateful Russian soldiers but manage to make their retreat in the Quinjet. As they head for home, the team wonders how they’ll explain this all to Agent Gyrich.

Recurring Characters

Avengers (Captain America, the Wasp, Quicksilver, Scarlet Witch, the Vision, the Beast, Wonder Man, Ms. Marvel, the Falcon), Elements of Doom (Carbon, Chlorine, Cobalt, Phosphorus, Radium, Vanadium), Inhumans (Black Bolt, Crystal, Karnak, Gorgon)

Continuity Notes

  1. Crystal will give birth to their child in Fantastic Four #240. She is named Luna in issue #248 of that series.

  2. Medusa went missing in Fantastic Four #207. Avengers Annual #12 reveals that she was a prisoner of the Enclave who have been working with Maximus.

  3. This interest in having children of her own. She will instinctively use her mystical powers to impregnate herself in Vision and the Scarlet Witch (vol. 2) #3, giving birth in issue #12 of that series. The truth of this childbirth is detailed in Avengers West Coast #52.

  4. One of the Russian fighter pilots likens the Avengers to their own native heroes Vanguard and Red Guardian. A footnote points readers to Iron Man #109 and Defenders #36.

Topical References

  • This story uses a number of dated Cold War references. Russia is referred to the USSR. Also a number of historical events are referred to in the present tense: The Cold War déntente from 1969 to 1974, The Strategic Arms Limitation Talks (aka SALT) that ran from 1947 until 1991. Also mentioned is the 1960 capture of Gary Powers, a CIA spy whose U-2 spy plane that was shot down in 1960. These should all be considered topical.

  • Wonder Man makes a comment about how he remembers how America was protective of its own borders in the 1950s, speaking in a way that suggests he was alive during that period. This should also be considered a topical reference.

  • The older Russian commander recounts Cap fighting with the Russians during World War II like he was there. This should be topical unless this commander had access to a process that prolonged his life, which is possible but unlikely given he is a one-off character that’s never seen again.

Avengers #187

Avengers #187

Avengers Annual #9

Avengers Annual #9