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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Avengers #329

Avengers #329

Starting Line-Up

The Avengers have just had their government clearing pulled, putting their future as crime fighters in jeopardy. Captain America has called an emergency meeting of all active and reserve Avengers to discuss the future. Answering the call are the Black Knight, Captain Marvel, Hercules, Hank Pym, Quicksilver, the Sub-Mariner, the Wasp, Wonder Man, Scarlet Witch, Sersi, Hawkeye, Mockingbird, Tigra, Iron Man, She-Hulk, US Agent, Black Widow, Quasar, the Falcon, Vision, Thor and Spider-Man. Cap calls the meeting to order and then introduces everyone to Devi Banerjee, a representative to the United Nations. She has come to tell the group that the UN is amending their charter to recognize the Avengers as a special unit in their peace-keeping forces. The group will specifically be tasked with dealing with cosmic, extraterrestrial, extra-dimensional, occult, sub-terranean, and sub-oceanic menaces, invasions, limited incursions, infestations, and enchantments that are not instigated, abetted, or sanctioned by a current member nation. When Captain America offers the opportunity for everyone to vote for this move, everyone unanimously votes in favor of joining the United Nations.

Meanwhile, in Hell’s Kitchen, the demon known as Ngh and his fellow prisoners have escaped the Dimension of Exile. Posing as gargoyles resting on the side of a church, Ngh has been taking in this world, learning its customs and its language and is now confident that he can manipulate people’s need for power to feed their own abilities. With a plan already in motion, Ngh and his followers take to the night sky.

Back at Avengers Headquarters, the Avengers get down to the next order of business: selecting a new roster for the east coast team and suitable reserve members who are on call when the need arises. The Vision suggests that reserve members should be selected to match the power base of active members so that the team doesn’t lose any strength should an active member be unavailable. While the Avengers begin voting on who will serve on the new team, Rage has arrived at the behest of Captain America. Since he is not an Avenger, he is not allowed to sit in on the vote. As such, Jarvis has Rage sit next to another guess, a mysterious man whose face is covered with a featureless mask. As everyone waits outside, the Avengers Support Crew all make guesses as to who the masked man is. John Jameson in particular finds the stranger familiar.[1]

In Brooklyn, the gang leader L.D. 50 is still furious over the fact that Rage wrecked one of his crack houses and still wants to get revenge. His ranting and ravings are overheard by Ngh, who is listening by the window. Deciding that L.D. and his gang would make suitable allies, Ngh adopts the “local vernacular” and appears before L.D. and his gang, offering an alliance that will allow the drug dealer a chance to get revenge as well as acquire limitless weath as well.

Later that evening, Captain America calls a press conference outside the newly completed Avengers Headquarters.[2] Aside from the newly selected roster, Rage and the masked man are also asked to attend, although Rage has no idea why. Captain America then announces that the new Avengers line up will consist of himself, Thor, the Black Widow, She-Hulk, Sersi and Quasar. He also announces that reserve status has been given to Spider-Man, Hercules, the Black Knight, Falcon, and Captain Marvel. When one of the reporters points out that the reserve roster hasn’t been filled, Cap takes the opportunity to announces that the final two slots are being given to a new probationary membership for new inductees to prove themselves. He then introduces the first heroes to fill these positions: Rage, and the masked man who is now revealed to be the recently reformed Sandman.

When introducing Rage to the crowd, Captain America makes a comment about how Rage’s grandmother would be proud to see him if she were alive today. Rage quiet corrects him, saying that his grandmother actually still alive.[3] That’s when a member of a protest group against the Avengers induction into the United Nations throws an egg at Rage, taking issue with a black man joining a group she views as fascists. Rage keeps his anger in check by muttering the same phrase over and over under his breath.

While this is happening, Ngh is helping L.D. 50 plot his revenge against Rage. The demon suggests their best opportunity would be to target someone the hero cares about. L.D. doesn’t know who that might be when he catches the scene at Avengers Headquarters unfolding on live TV. Ngh can read lips and tells L.D. that the words he is saying over and over are “Granny Staples”, the name of Rage’s grandmother. Although Ngh doesn’t know this, he knows that this obviously someone Rage cares about and tells L.D. that if they find this Granny Staples, they’ll find a way to get at Rage.

Back at Avengers Headquarters, the Avengers try to hold Rage back but he shoves his way into the crowd to confront the protestor who threw the egg at him. He calls her on her bullying behavior. He then tells her point blank that the Avengers aren’t his friends, and isn’t sure he even likes any of them and believes the feeling is mutual. However, he points out that this all stems from cultural differences and generations of hate and misunderstanding, something that they will never overcome with outside agitation. He only joined the Avengers so he can change it from within and make it a better organization. Captain America admits that while Rage’s methods sometimes scare him, he can’t disagree with what is in his heart.

Suddenly, the meeting is interrupted by a bright flash in the sky. Suddenly five strange entities calling themselves the Tetrarch of Entropy appear in the sky. They consist of the giant snake Hafga, the one-eyed pyramid Yod, Vug the living flame, and the humanoid Heml who projects the images of both male and female humanoids. They accuse the Avengers of freeing Ngh and his followers from the Dimension of Exile and banishes the core team to that dimension. The remaining Avengers — both reservists and visiting members — lunge to attack the Tetrarch, but they easily blast the heroes aside before teleporting away themselves.

The captured Avengers find themselves transported to the Dimension of Exile where the Tetrarch of Entrpy have sealed both Thor’s hammer Mjolnir and Sersi in impenetrable crystal cubes, preventing them from returning home the same way they had done in the past.

That evening in Brooklyn, Granny Staples is woken by her doorbell and goes to see who is ringing at this hour of the night. When she opens the door she is greeted by Ngh who tries to introduce himself. However Granny Staples cuts him off as she recognizes him as the devil. Grabbing a broom, Granny tells “Satan” to get off her stoop before she knocks him off herself.

Recurring Characters

Avengers (Black Widow, Captain America, Quasar, She-Hulk, Sersi, Thor, Vision), Black Knight, Captain Marvel, Falcon, Hawkeye, Hercules, Iron Man, Mockingbird, Sub-Mariner, Hank Pym, Quicksilver, Scarlet Witch, Rage, Sandman, Spider-Man, Tigra, US Agent, Wasp, Wonder Man, Edwin Jarvis, John Jameson, Peggy Carter, Michael O’Brien, Ngh, Xa, L.D. 50, Orm, Tetrarchs of Entropy (Yod, Hafga, Vug, Heml), J. Jonah Jameson, Joe Robertson, Granny Staples

Continuity Notes

  1. John Jameson has never actually met the Sandman prior to this story (surprisingly enough). However, the Sandman has clashed with Spider-Man many times dating back to Amazing Spider-Man #4. As such, John likely learned much about the villain by virtue of the fact that his father, J. Jonah Jameson, is publisher of the Daily Bugle a newspaper that frequently reported the Sandman’s criminal activities in the past. At the time of this story, the Sandman had reformed from his criminal past for a while now, starting in Marvel Two-In-One #86. This will remain the status quo until Sandman is brainwashed back into becoming a villain in Peter Parker: Spider-Man #12.

  2. This marks the grand opening of Avengers Headquarters. It exists at the site of the original Avengers Mansion that was the team’s first headquarters dating back to Avengers #2. After the mansion was attacked by the Masters of Evil in Avengers #273-277, it was moved to Hydrobase in the following issue. Hydrobase was later sank by Doctor Doom in Avengers #311, taking the mansion with it. This brand new headquarters will continue to serve the team until it is replaced with a replica of the original mansion from an alternate reality in Avengers #375.

  3. This is another subtle hint to the fact that Rage is actually a 14 year old, despite looking like an adult. The Avengers won’t learn the truth about him until Avengers #341.

Topical References

  • One of the protestors accuses Rage of being an “Uncle Tom” which is a dated epitaph and slur used to describe a black person who is subservient to whites. It is in reference to the 1852 novel “Uncle Tom’s Cabin” about a a black slave named — you guessed it — Uncle Tom. It is about as progressive as you’d expect an novel from the 1800s written by an old white woman to be, hence why it is so offensive.

Avengers #328

Avengers #328

Avengers #330

Avengers #330