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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Captain America Comics #60

Captain America Comics #60

The Human Fly

Jeff Mace and Fred Davis take some time to enjoy the circus, which features an act called the Human Fly -- a man in a fly costume that climbs up dangerous heights. However, Mike Galen, the man in the suit ends up falling and losing his nerve to do the show again. After he tells his girlfriend and the conductor, he decides to take up jobs that will place him in high places so he can earn his courage back.

Shortly thereafter, a window washer witnesses a man placing jewels in an office safe as he is washing a window high above the ground. He considers stealing them, and realizes that one would have to be a human fly to do that, and suddenly gets some inspiration. Later that night as Jeff and Fred are returning home, Fred is struck on the head by a piece of masonry. Looking up the building, they see the Human Fly breaking into one of the upper floor windows. They quickly change into Captain America and Bucky and rush into the building, taking an elevator to the top.

They confront the Human Fly as he tries to escape from the roof. During the fight, Cap is knocked off the side of the building. He saves himself by grabbing a wooden flagpole and when it snaps directs himself through a window. Bucky soon comes to him to inform Cap that the Human Fly managed to escape.

Believing that the Human Fly is the man from the circus, Cap and Bucky rush there and question Mike's girlfriend, who tells them that he is not there and that he's been going out late at night. Deciding to track down the Human Fly, Cap and Bucky get a helicopter and start patrolling the city. Spotting him, Cap lets Bucky out while he lands the helicopter. The Human Fly tries to flee by parachuting off the building, but Bucky jumps onto him causing their combined weight to make them fall faster. However, the Human Fly still manages to escape.

The next day, Captain America and Bucky begin trailing Mike Galen and follow him into a theatre. There they confront him and learn that he has taken up a job working the lights at the theatre in order to get over his fear of heights. When explaining to him that they have been after someone in his Human Fly costume, Galen tells them that his spare suit was stolen and that he suspects that a window washer who was hired to clean their rooms might have been responsible.

Learning that the company was called the Hi-Low Window Washing Company, they rush there to owned by Hyram Heale. They find the office empty, but searching it they find a newspaper clipping about John Moth, a lighthouse keeper who has a stamp collection valued at $25000. They rush to the lighthouse where they catch the Human Fly as he tries to break in. A fight breaks out, but the Human Fly founds himself out matched and attempts to flee. As he rushes down the lighthouse, he trips over an alcove where food is stored, knocking over a barrel of molasses. The sticky liquid then gets caught in the suction cups of the Human Fly costume, planting the villain to the ground. Captain America fells the Human Fly with a single punch and reveals him to be Hyram Heale and get the lighthouse keeper to call the authorities.

Recurring Characters

Captain America, Bucky

The Last Case of Inspector Leeds

Jeff Mace's class is visited by a special guest, Inspector Leeds, a renown detective who has not lost a single case. He tells the class that since he retired from the police department he has become a private investigator for insurance companies. Later that night, Jeff Mace and Fred Davis decide to pay Leeds a visit as Jeff has more questions to ask him. Entering Leeds home they find him dead, apparently due to a self inflicted gun shot wound to the head. They find a suicide note that claims that he killed himself because he could not solve the murder of Rocky Rhodes.

Changing into Captain America and Bucky, the two heroes decide to solve the case, first going to visit Rhodes girlfriend "Broadway" Lil Carter. However, their visit is not welcomed by Carter who asks them to leave. Suddenly Sheik Malone appears with his gang and believes that Carter is trying to double cross him and starts shooting. Captain America and Bucky easily subdue Malone and his gang, but Broadway Lil is more furious than ever and demands the leave right away.

As they flee, Captain America explains to Bucky that they did not bust Sheik Malone as he suspects he was responsible for kidnapping then later murdering Rocky Rhodes. They go to the Schooner Club, where Rhodes was killed to search for clue and run into more of Malone's men. They easily fight their way through the gang and make their way to Malone's office where they find a check for fifty grand made out by Broadway Lil. Leaving them to believe that Carter hired Malone to murder Rhodes. Paying a visit to the Sure Life Insurance Company, they learn that Rhodes had taken out a half-a-million dollar life insurance policy and named Lil as his beneficiary.

They then break into Broadway Lil's apartment when she is not home and find a photo of Rhodes as well as his signet ring. It all convinces Cap that she did not pay anyone to kill Rhodes. They go to the morgue where they check on the coroners report on Rhodes and learn that the cause of death was a shotgun blast to the face and notes that he was wearing his signet ring as well. This all convinces Captain America exactly what is going on. They then tail Broadway Lil to the Schooner Club and walk in on her in her dressing room where she is with Rocky Rhodes.

With their insurance fraud scheme revealed, Captain America and Bucky easily subdue them, but Lil presses a panic button that brings Malone and his men into the room. Cap and Bucky also easily defeat them as well and turn them over to the authorities, explaining everything.

Recurring Characters

Captain America, Bucky

The Catman Murders

A mysterious costumed killer named the Catman has murdered five victims prompting the police to call in the Human Torch and Toro to assist in the investigation. The two flaming heroes go on patrol and catch the Catman attempting to kill another victim. When they try to trap the Catman in a circle of fire, the Catman runs through it and escapes. Checking on the victim they find that he is still alive and rush him to the hospital.

The next day the Torch and Toro interview the man and he thanks them for saving his life. He also tells them that he is considering changing his insurance policy to benefit his daughter, telling them that he had originally named Dr. Kale as beneficiary. Kale, he explains treated him years ago at a charity hospital and named him as beneficiary as a means of somehow repaying him. The two heroes then look into the other victims and find that they too had insurance policies where they named Dr. Kale as the beneficiary.

They rush to the hospital where Dr. Francis tells them that Dr. Kale has left for the day, but allows them to look around the facility. After the tour they find nothing of interest but the Torch still has them wait outside. Hearing a cat's meow, they follow the feline to an open basement window where they find Kale in the basement with the Catman who is chained to the wall. While the Catman keeps the heroes at bay, Dr. Kale escapes. The Torch and Toro follow after him unaware that the Catman has broken free from his bonds.

Upstairs in one of the offices they find that Dr. Kale had been wearing a mask, and suddenly they are confronted by "Dr. Francis", who turns out to be the real Dr. Kale. Before he can shoot the two heroes, the Catman -- one of Kale's insane patients -- does not recognize him without his mask and attacks him. They fall out a window and fall down onto a barge below. While the Catman dies in the fall, Kale survives and is turned over to the authorities.

Recurring Characters

Human Torch, Toro

Case of the Careless Killers

Richard and his sister pay a visit to their ill Aunt Christy, who tells them that when she dies she has willed her entire fortune to a charity instead of them when she has her will changed the next day.

The two siblings then arrange for Christy to overdose on sleeping pills and in order to make it look like she has been dead longer pluck some petals from the Gardenias on her night table, then call the police.

Detective Mike Trapp is sent to investigate and he looks over the scene and then arrests the two siblings for the murder of their aunt. Later, after a confession is given, Trapp explains to Pepper Burns that the killers gave themselves away by plucking the Gardenia's petals, as Gardenia's do not shed their petals as they die.

Recurring Characters

Detective Mike Trapp

The Big Fight

Fred Davis is placing a call on a pay phone to check in on Jeff Mace when he suddenly spots some boys ganging up on one boy. Fred breaks up the fight and learns meets Timmy Kelly, who got in the fight after they called his father -- former boxer "Roundhouse" Kelly -- a bum. Fred walks Timmy home and meets his father who has since retired from boxing and is now the janitor of the very arena he once boxed. Timmy wants to participate in the Kid Gloves tournament so that he can use the prize money to buy a gym for his father so he doesn't need to be a janitor any more.

Remembering that he forgot to call Jeff, Fred rushes to the phone and agrees to meet him at Highway 8. Changing into Bucky, Fred arrives just as Captain America is finishing up a fight a gang of fur thieves. When the authorities arrive, they learn that the leader of the mob is a guy who calls himself Hatchetface but don't know what he looks like.

Returning to their civilian identities, Jeff and Fred return to the Lee School as Fred tells about the Kid Gloves tournament. They see a bulletin asking student to help raise money for the athletics department and Jeff suggests that Fred participate in the Kid Glove match in order to get the money the school needs. As Timmy and his father train for the match, so does Jeff and Fred. While at the secret hideout of Hatchetface, he and his gang decide to make sure that the Kid Gloves match ends in a fix so that they can reap the gambling benefits.

The tournament begins and eventually the final two contenders are Fred and Timmy. This news puts Fred in a bind as he doesn't want to beat Timmy since he could use the money. The next day as Timmy prepares for the match, he and his father are visited by Hatchetface and his men who demand that he throw the fight. Overhearing this, Jeff and Fred change into Captain America and Bucky and attack. However, the gang manages to get away. Bucky changes out of his costume and prepares for the match while Captain America decides to stick around and make sure nothing happens.

As they all walk to the match, they are once more confronted by Hatchetface and his gang and another fight breaks out. During the course of the fight, Fred changes into Bucky again and twists his ankle while Roundhouse Kelly knocks Hatchetface out with a single punch. Later during the match, Fred loses due to his twisted ankle and Timmy is awarded the money. However, in a interesting twist, Captain America is awarded $500 for helping to capture Hatchetface and his gang, money that he will donate to the Lee School athletics department.

Recurring Characters

Captain America, Bucky

Continuity Notes

  • Per What If? #4, the appearances of Captain America and Bucky here are attributed to Jeff Mace and Fred Davis.

Captain America Comics #59

Captain America Comics #59

Captain America Comics #61

Captain America Comics #61