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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Spider-Man & The Human Torch in... ¡Bahía De Los Muertos!

Spider-Man & The Human Torch in... ¡Bahía De Los Muertos!

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Off the coast of Puerto Rico, a tour group is enjoying a midnight swim in a bioluminescent bay. Suddenly they are attacked by strange darkness that comes out of the water and strips the flesh off the bone.

Meanwhile, in New York City, a mugger tries to steal a woman's purse in Times Square but is busted by Spider-Man. The wall-crawler then meets up with the Human Torch at the Baxter Building to eat pizza and play video games. However, before they can begin the Fantastic Four get a distress call from Puerto Rico. Johnny is not impressed with this due to the trouble he had there last time. With the rest of the Fantastic Four away, Johnny convinces Spider-Man to tag along with him.

Taking the Fantasti-Car, the Torch and Spider-Man soon arrive at the scene of the mysterious murder. They are suddenly attacked by the creature that killed the tourists. While Johnny keeps it at bay with his flame powers, Spider-Man gets the officer out of harm’s way. When Spider-Man tries to catch him up in webbing, the strange creature dives down into the water. Finding themselves out of their league, Johnny agrees with Spider-Man that they should try and contact Reed and get his help. The Human Torch manages to reach Reed, but the rest of the Fantastic Four are busy battling evil aliens in space. Going over Johnny's data, he tells them that they will have to revert the creature back to its original form as it had been transmuted.

With nobody to contact, Johnny feels out of his league. The officer tells them that he knows what it is like to let people down. He talks about bomb tests that were widely protested on the island. He was forced to arrest his own wife due to government orders to quash the resistance. However, he learned the errors of his ways after his wife developed breast cancer and died. Learning that the United States military did not clean up the bomb test sites as well as they claimed, Spider-Man suspects that's where they might find their monster.

Going to the location of the bomb tests, they find a strange domicile and inside they find their old foe Diablo. Diablo is about to attack them when he learns that the office with them comes from the island of Vieques, Diablo changes his tone. He explains that he discovered the island centuries ago and witnessed the genocide caused by Christopher Columbus and his explorers and drove them away. He vowed to protect the people of Vieques whenever they were in danger. Learning about the monster that has been terrorizing the people of the island. Diablo then lends his expertise to help destroy the creature. With a special formula made by Diablo, Spider-Man and the Torch manage to destroy the creature. In the aftermath of the battle what appears to Diablo turns into a dried-out husk.

With Diablo gone and the danger over, the Torch passes out from exhaustion. When Johnny wakes up he finds that the rest of the Fantastic Four have arrived. Meeting up with Reed, Johnny is told that he did a great job.

Recurring Characters

Spider-Man, Human Torch, Diablo, Fantastic Four (Mister Fantastic, Invisible Woman, Thing), HERBIE

Continuity Notes

  • Johnny mentions the trouble he had last time he was in Puerto Rico, this is a reference to Fantastic Four: Isla De La Muerte! #1.

  • This story references a US Navy Base that was stationed near Vieques that tested munitions from 1941 to 2003. The people of Puerto Rico protested the site in 1999 when people began getting sick. The site was eventually cleaned up in 2014, yet trace contaminants still exist. The protests in question should be considered a topical reference per the Sliding Timescale of Earth-616 as the protests will eventually become dated.

Fantastic Four: Isla De La Muerte!

Fantastic Four: Isla De La Muerte!