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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Dark Reign: Savage She-Hulk #3

Dark Reign: Savage She-Hulk #3

Killer Madonna

Having travelled into the past to seek out the world's greatest hero, apparently Norman Osborn, Lyra is now face to face with Osborn's Dark Avengers. In his Iron Patriot armor, Osborn orders Noh-Varr to deal with the woman and he traps her inside a pocket battlefield so he can defeat her in battle. Inside, Noh-Varr explains that he is an interdimensionally travelling Kree and that encountered many gendercide worlds as Lyras. He is impressed by her appearance and wants to get a good look before he can inflict damage upon her. Lyra knows all about the Kree as well. She mentions how in her future, the Origins Corporation endows everyone on Earth with powers and they enslave the Kree, among many other races until ultimately, humanity destroyed them and themselves. Noh-Varr laughs at this, telling her that if she kills Norman Osborn in the past, all she will do is create a future divergent from her own. As he mocks her plan, Lyra suddenly is able to navigate through the pocket battlefield and get close enough to the Kree warrior to break his arm. However, this is hardly a handicap for someone who is tripple joinet and Noh-Varr uses this to his advantage. As the two struggle, Lyra thanks back to her childhood..

... Years ago on Earth-8009, Lyra recalls how her fellow sisters would bully her. On one day, a group of girls were beating on her until they were frightened away by the Gynosure. Lyra tells her that the children make fun of her because of her green skin and the fact that she is the only child born of natural birth in many centuries. The Gynosure tells her a little about her father and how he gets stronger the angrier he gets and points out that the opposite is true about Lyra. However, this granted her an unseen strength: the ability to see gamma rays and channel them by going into an autotrance and allowing them to flow through them to win any battle...

... As her recollection ends, Lyra begins to focus on the ambient gamma rays in her environment and enters her trance-like state. This allows her to easily defeat the Kree warrior in battle. Outside of the pocket battlefield, Osborn grows patient and sends Daken in to see what is going on. When he walks inside the battlefield, Lyra spots him. For a brief moment she sees him as her friend Nella and is distracted long enough for Noh-Varr to scratch her with one of his finger nails. The toxins within knock her out instantly, putting an end to the conflict. Lyra's writer computer Boudicca is remove and she is taken prisoner by the Dark Avengers. As she sleeps, Lyra's mind drifts back to the last moments of Nella's life....

... It was on Earth-8009 just prior to Lyra's travels into the past. There she and her fellow Femazons were sent to St. Louis to recover a needed component to replace the one that operated the female's birthing cradles. After completing her mission, Lyra was attacked by her friend Nella. As it turns out, Nella was acting on the advice of the Gynosure as Lyra's natural born masculenity was now viewed as a political liability and so she had been sanctioned to kill Lyra, making it look like she was murdered by one of the Berserkers. Lyra fought back, snapping the neck of her friend with a single blow. The needed circuitboard was also smashed in the process. Suddenly, Lyra was swarmed by the various tribes of men and fled from them for eight full days. They followed her all the way back to the city of Milago. However, they could not get past the gates thanks to the Black Bloom that defended their lands from male intruders. Lyra then went to confront the Gynosure over what happened in St. Louis. However, Gynosure was prepared for her and using gamma radiation against her weakens Lyra. She explains that the main reason she is feared and hated among the women is because those born of the cradles are sterile, while Lyra, birthed naturally, is not. With the only remaining component to preserve the cradles destroyed, the women are doomed to extinction unless Lyra agrees to venture into the past and get what is needed there....

... Lyra's recollection ends there as she wakes up in a lab in Avengers Tower with Norman Osborn standing before her. Osborn explains that he intends to torture her in order to learn why she had come to the past to kill him. While outside of the tower, the Sentry deals with the press and their questions about Lyra in order to make HAMMER look good. Watching this from the Hollow are the agents of ARMOR who are furious over HAMMER taking the credit for their work. Charles Little Sky demands to know what's going on, one of his agents informs them that they can still track Lyra by her body heat, and that temperature is rising. Meanwhile, back in New York, the She-Hulk makes it back into the city after the Sentry tossed her all the way to New Jersey. She manages to catch him off guard, knocking him down with a single punch. This activates an alarm in Avengers Tower causing the Dark Avengers to assemble. Left unattended, Boudicca then begins hacking her way into the databases in the tower.

As Osborn is about to leave the lab, the doors suddenly shut and Lyra's shackles open. Back at ARMOR, they discover the reason why Lyra's temperature continues to increase: She's not angry, she's ovulating. At that moment, Lyra has confronted Osborn, but instead of attacking him, she kisses him on the mouth, much to his shock and surprise.

Recurring Characters

Lyra, ARMOR (Charles Little Sky), She-Hulk, Dark Avengers (Iron Patriot, Captain Marvel, Spider-Man, Wolverine, Sentry, Ares, Ms. Marvel), Gynosure

Continuity Notes

  • Noh-Varr mentions his interdimensional travels which were first seen in Marvel Boy Vol 2 #1. He also refers to Lyra as a "Bannerwoman," this is because not long after he arrived on Earth-616 he fought a trio of "Bannermen" with Hulk like powers, as seen in Marvel Boy Vol 2 #2.

Dark Reign: Savage She-Hulk #2

Dark Reign: Savage She-Hulk #2

Dark Reign: Savage She-Hulk #4

Dark Reign: Savage She-Hulk #4