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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Doc Samson (Vol. 2) #2

Doc Samson (Vol. 2) #2

Adventure the Second: The Orgone Invasion

Doc Samson is lifting weights in his office building/residence's weight room. Elsewhere in the Samson household (in the Trophy Room to be exact), Tina Punnett repairs a damaged Robot X. Seeing no reason to let such a useful piece of technology gather dust, she reason that it could be used to pick up some of the Living Totem's slack around the house if she simply swaps out his Ego Core, thereby nuetralizing any threat he could pose. While trying to swap out his Wilke's Free-Will Nucleus for an Asimov Restraint Unit, she is interrupted by Jack Holyoak. Claiming he can simply pacify it with a simple bind spell, Jack fumbles and instead animates Tina's screw driver

Tina knocks Jack to the ground to avoid the now flying screwdriver and begin arguing about is incompetence. Around the time Jack tries to switch gears with the old gem "admit it: you're hot for my bod", a now animated Robot X declares "ENOUGH HUMAN SENTIMENTALITY! YOU BOTH MUST DIE!" Narrowly avoiding Robot X's smashing steel fist, Tina rushes to the intercom to call for back up. ("Samson to the Trophy Room to hit something!")

As Samson rushes to the Trophy Room, Samson mutter to himself "Reed Richards, Scott Summers, Steve Rogers, Tony Stark -- did any of them ever bother warning me what leading a team involved? And I wondered why they all started chuckling when I set up this menagerie!" He then encounters Whistle Pig (the Living Totem), who follows him to the disturbance. Now in the Trophy Room, Whistle Pig rushes the robot, only to be knocked aside. Holyoak prepares a spell, but Samson just rushes past him and demonishes the robot with one punch.

In the aftermath, Jack and Tina return to bickering before Samson tells them they should be more concerned with their wounds. Doc tell Jack he has no doubt his magic had some part in this. Tina tells Doc that the force of his blow was limited to the robots hydrolics, all easily replaced, so they could probably cut Jack a little slack. Despite Tina's forgiving mood, Doc feels Jack could stand to atone a little, and tells him to start by cleaning up the mess left by the fight.

Doc and Tina retreat to his Com Room, where Doc is scheduled to talk his old friend, Sam Larouquette at Gamma Base. Once he gets in touch with Gamma Base, however, he is surprised to learn that Sam Larouquette has abandonned the base to seek a new life at New Orgonon. Samson is told that everyone at the base is concerned if he should learn anything else, and remarks that this does not seem like Sam at all.

Catching the smell of incense, Doc and Tina exit to find Jack has been listening in on the conversation, and prepared a spell that can show them what Sam is doing that very minute. While an image of Sam happily working a field materializes in the mists over Jack's grimoire, Samson reveals that does know something of New Orgonon:

Orgonon, he explains, is what controversil psychiatrist Wilhelm Reich named his ranch in Rangely, Maine. (Wilhelm Reich is best know for his theory of the orgone and orgone energy, supposedly an organic energy forming the basis of all life.) New Orgonon, in contrast, is a splinter group with a reputation a cult, which has embarked on a program to harness orgone energy for as-yet unknown purposes. Doc has even heard rumors of brainwashing. Jack suggests they should head up there and kick some... people. Doc agrees, and before long they arrive at the Bangor, Maine airport.

After a few hours of eastward driving, they near New Orgonon. Jack comments that the area makes Green Acres look like Beverly Hills. Doc, on the other hand, tells him that appearances can be decieving: the man behind New Orgonon, Arick Schnellageister, is a first rate mind, and his research into plant mutations has been ground-breaking work. If he has chosen to devote so much time to Reich's theories, then he may already have gotten some interesting results.

As soon as they arrive in New Orgonon, Whistle Pig is inexplicably drawn to the barn. Doc manages to wrestle him to the ground just as he gets near Sam Larouquette and Arick Schnellageister, who are testing a large new cloudbuster. Though Sam is happy to see his old comrade-in-arms, Schnellageister demands that Whistle Pig immediately leave the premises. Whistle Pig willingly departs, saying he will be near the estate's perimeter.

Sam tells Doc he hopes he'll give real thought to Dr. Schnellageister's theories, and that he feels their research into orgone energy has the potential to turn the world into a Utopia. When Doc tells Sam he's more concerned with his mental integrity, Sam tells him he has one helluva nerve questioning him. Doc begins to tell him he's simply concerned for him, but then thinks better and tells him just to show him whatever he thinks he needs to see. Appeased, Sam tells him that now he's acting like the fair-minded Leonard Samson he remembers. Schnellageister suggests that they all break bread together, and they all retreat to the dining hall.

Schnellageister offers a few brief words on the potential of the community before they begin their vegetarian meal. Now sooner has Doc taken a bite of the orgone-seasoned food than he turns hostile and grabs Jack and Tina. Satisfied than Samson will be a valuable asset to spreading his gospel, Schnellageister turns off the small device he's kept conceiled in his pocket. Doc freezes in his tracks, Jack and Tina still held above his head. Just then Whistle Pig breaks through the dining hall's wall. Somehow his presence disrupts the command linkage coming from the barn (Schnellageister gives a lot away in that phrase), and Samson drops Jack and Tina. Schnellageister tries to reassert control over the Doc, and orders him to kill them all. Whistle Pig knocks him aside, and all three run for the truck. (The remaining New Orgononians, meanwhile, are placidly eating their meal.)

As they pass the barn, the door bursts open, finally revealing the horrendous Weed. Whistle Pig suspects it has been fed on orgone energy so long that it has become a telepathic predator; ingesting a portion of it as Samson did would then makes the victim's mind easy prey. Whistle Pig confronts the hungry Weed, while Tina and Jack run off to find a more permanent solution. That plan does not last long and, repelled by the stronger Weed, Whistle Pig flies to Join Jack and Tina as they drive toward Rangely.

With his enemies retreating, Schnellageister gathers his "orgone army". Several hours later as the entranced New Orgononians prepare to relocate, Jack and Tina arrive with their long-term solution: lots of herbicide. Schnellageister orders the controlled colonists to attack, but they are worse than zombies, and trip all over each other. Jack and Tina hit Weed with a large amount of herbicide, but in his rage Weed manages to cover them both with his tendrils. Thankfully, Whistle Pig had taken the opportunity to flank Weed, and strike at him with the colony's cloudbuster. Weed was then destroyed with the same orgone energy that created him. With Weed gone, Samson resumes control of his body, and captures Schnellageister.

Epilogue
On the SHIELD Helicarrier somewhere over the Atlantic, we find that Scorpion has been taken into custody by SHIELD guards. Khanata protests that he is sure of her innocence, but there are witnesses that say otherwise. It is clear they will need some help, and Khanata knows just the man... Doc Samson!

A Brief History of Modern Cults
An article by Professor Dorsey Huffnail (currently holder of the Josiah Carberry Chair at Brown University with advanced degrees in Ethnobotany, Psychoceramics, Nuerolinguistics, Semiotics, Bio-engineering, Moletronics, and Musicology) on the proliferation of modern-day cults. Huffnail notes that in this day and age there are as many cults dedicated to eccentric beliefs and faith in the improbable as during the decline of the Roman Empire, including people "from glossy Hollywood stars to snake-handling hillbillies, from your next door neighbor to famous politicians." Followers of the Arica Institute, for example, led by Bolivian philosophy teacher Oscar Ichazo, boast of contacting "the Permanent 24", a mysterious state of mind devoid of content. They worship a radiant being called TOHAM KUM RAH, claiming to contact him through various psychocalisthenics such as absorbing sound through the feet or gyrating in an Egyptian/African manner. Followers of the Hindu holyman Sathya Sai Baba claim he can produce coins, candy and fruit from an empty bag, multiply meager food into great quantities, perform psychic surgery in the Fillipino manner, and that when worshippers through flower petals in front of him, they spontaneously form the letters of his name. Here in America, the Holy Alamo Christian Church keeps the corpse of its co-founder, Susan Alamo, on display in expectation of an imminent public resurrection. The Unity School of Christianity based in Kansas City Missouri does not believe in evil or sin, but it does believe that inanimate object have souls. For the most part these various cults are harmless, but every now and then they erupt in violence, as with Jim Jones, the Falun Gong, and Heaven's Gate.

Recurring Characters

Doc Samson, Tina Punnett, Jack Holyoak, Living Totem, Sam LaRoquette, Weed, Robot X, SHIELD (Scorpion, Derek Khanata)

Continuity Notes

  • Tina mentions how Robot X once destroyed "half of Cleveland" she is referring to the robots rampage chronicled in Amazing Adventures #4.

  • Mention is made with Sam LaRoquette's past association with Gamma Base. He was a member of the Hulkbusters from Incredible Hulk #317-342 until he was recruited by the Leader and turned into Rock in Incredible Hulk #343. LaRoquette was last seen in his Rock form in Incredible Hulk #464. How he was restored to human form is unrevealed.

Doc Samson (Vol. 2) #1

Doc Samson (Vol. 2) #1

Doc Samson (Vol. 2) #3

Doc Samson (Vol. 2) #3