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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Miss America Comics #1

Miss America Comics #1

Miss America Battles Baron Shinto the Gouger!

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At a Japanese internment camp in the American Southwest, Baron Shinto is informed by one of the other prisoners that everything is going according to plan in other camps. Shinto then cuts his arm open with When the soldiers bring the wounded man in for medical attention he claims that the other prisoners are trying to kill him and asks to be moved to another camp. This ploy works and soon the prisoner is being moved to another camp. Along the way, Shinto asks for a cigarette. While the soldiers are distracted, the Baron secretly fits some metal blades onto his index and middle fingers and uses them to kill the guard and the driver.

Not that far away, Madeline Joyce is racing back to town to catch a train back home after being on vacation. Along the way, she hears a radio report about how half a dozen Japanese prisoners have escaped at different internment camps within the same hour. That’s when she sees a stalled jeep and pulls over to pick up the stranded driver. She is unaware that this is Baron Shinto. When she gets out of her car, Shinto tries to stab her with his finger blades, but she manages to evade the swipe and escapes by kicking him in the shin. Running to cover, Madeline then changes into Miss America, however by the time she is ready to face her foe again, he has stolen her car. Flying after the stolen vehicle, Miss America is led to a train station. Peeking into the window she discovers that the escaped Japanese prisoners have come here and taken the station attendant prisoner. Listening in, she learns that they forced the attendant to send a telegraph to the oncoming train, all part of their plan. When the train approaches, the Japanese men untie the attendant so he can meet the train but warn him not to raise the alarm. Confused by all of this, Miss America is even more confused when three men get off the train. Listening in on their conversation, she hears that the conductor received a telegraph warning these three men that they would be in danger if they remained on the train. All three men just happen to be Philippino men who are roughly the same size and build as three of the escaped prisoners.

Realizing that the Japanese escapees are trying to take the place of the Phillipino men, Miss America comes crashing in through the window and fights the escapees. Unfortunately, she is busy with the others she is unprepared when Baron Shinto sneaks up behind her and breaks a chair over her head. When Miss America recovers from the blow she discovers that she has been tied up by her enemies. She watches as three of the Japanese men, rigged with explosives, dress in the clothing they stole from the train passengers. Miss American quickly deduces that these men are suicide bombers who are going to blow something up. With their spies boarding the next train, Baron Shinto orders the rest of their men to carry their prisoners out into the desert where they plan to busy them alive. While their captors are busy digging the crave, Miss America manages to break free from her bonds and overpowers one of the Japanese operatives, taking his gun. She mows down her captors while the other prisoners make a run for it. Although she kills the gravediggers, Baron Shinto manages to flee into the desert. Miss America takes to the air to try and find him but decides to leave him to his fate to go back and look for her fellow captives to make sure they are safe. She finds the train station attendant and two of the Phillipino men. The Philippino men explain that they are employees of the Embassy of the Philippines and that they were going to a nearby aircraft factory to christen three new fighter planes that are named after their homeland.

Flying to the aircraft plant, Miss America goes to warn the manager and catches Baron Shinto trying to kill the factory manager. In the ensuing struggle, Miss America kicks Baron Shinto out of the office window sending him plummeting to his death. With no time to lose, she flies across the property and locates all three of the suicide bombers and drops them in the middle of the desert before they explode. With the danger over, Miss America changes back to her civilian guise and manages to make it to the train station just in time to grab the newspaper. It’s an extra edition that has a front-page story about Miss America’s daring rescue.

Recurring Characters

Miss America

The Mystery of the Monster Men!

During a daring jailbreak, a prisoner by the name of Lifer Larch manages to escape despite the efforts of the guards to stop him. Lifer manages to escape into the nearby mountains and coming upon a castle and decides that this would be an ideal place to hide out for the night. Inside, a scientist named Professor Drakula has determined that his recent human experiment is a failure but can’t bring himself to kill his patient. That’s when Lifer Larch comes in and shoots the patient with a gun. The pair quickly realize that they could be useful to each other, Professor Drakula needs fresh bodies to experiment on and Lifer Larch can bring them to him and, if necessary, eliminate them when things go wrong.

A few weeks later, Madeline Joyce is reading the newspaper and wonders if there is a connection between the disappearance of three prominent citizens and Lifer Larch still being at large. Changing into Miss America, Madeline flies from her home to investigate the two stories. She first pays a visit to the wife of most recent missing person. Mrs. Green tells Miss America that her husband received a letter and said he was taking a trip up into the mountains. When she looks at the letter, Miss America is surprised to see that the paper is blank. However, when she holds the paper over the radiator the words — written in a special ink — appear. It’s a letter from Professor Boris Drakula who has asked Mister Green to come to his home in the mountains as he has something important to show him. Miss America decides that she should pay Professor Drakula a visit and flies to his castle.

Her approach is spotted by Lifer Larch who warns Professor Drakula, however, the scientist is ready for her and uses his device to revive his latest creation. This creature, simply called Number Three, is a hideous monstrosity that attacks Miss America as soon as she arrives. The heroine puts up a good fight but the monster manages to strike her over the head from behind, knocking her out. Number Three then drags her into the castle and throws her in a cell. With this nuisance dealt with, Professor Drakula prepares to perform surgery on John Greene. John demands to know why they are doing this. As it turns out he was the man who sent Lifer Larch to prison and this is his way to get revenge. By this time, Miss America has recovered from her beating and breaks out of her cell. This time when Number Three tries to stop her she easily beats the monster.

Professor Drakula then summons his first two Monster Men, who are larger and more powerful than Number Three. However, these creatures are not very smart and Miss America lures them outside and tricks them from walking off the edge of a cliff. Flying back inside, Number Three’s beating has jarred his memories and remembers that he is really Judge Hendrick, or at least his head is. He reveals to Miss America that Professor Drakula creates his Monster Men with the body parts of multiple victims. Furious over being turned into a monster, Judge Hendrick throws the Professor over the cliff to his death as well. No going without a fight, Lifer Larch fatally shoots Judge Hendrick sending him over the cliff. Miss America quickly disarms Larch and learns that Professor Drakula was trying to build an army of Monster Men to take over the world. Not wanting this technology to fall into the wrong hands, Miss America short circuits the scientific devices in the lab causing the castle to explode before taking Lifer off to prison.

Recurring Characters

Miss America

Murders by Yogi

Madeline Joyce boards the bus after a shopping spree and is almost bowled over by two bearded men rushing to get off the bus. Taking a seat the man sitting next to her suddenly puts his head on her shoulder. Thinking the man fell asleep, Madeline pushes his head aside. That’s when she notices a knife buried in his chest and realizes the man is actually dead. While the other passengers are in a state of shock, Madeline deduces that the two men from earlier are responsible and rushes off the bus to try and stop them. When a police officer tries to get her to stop, she ducks into the back of a taxi where she quickly changes into Miss America. With the police following behind her, Miss America catches up to the two men.One of them grabs a passerby and threatens to kill her with a knife. Unfortunately for him, Miss America proves to be faster than he is and easily disarms the man and frees his hostage. With the police arriving on the scene, Miss America leaves them to arrest the first man while she chases after the other. Entering the building, she spots the man duck into an elevator going to the roof of the skyscraper. Unphased by this, Miss America goes back outside and flies above the building and waits until the second killer is far enough away from the others on the roof to nab him.

However, that’s when things take a turn for the strange. A third man — wearing a turban — climbs up onto the western ledge of the observation deck and begins bowing to to the sky. When one of the attendants tries to stop him, the killer interferes saying that the man bowing is a Muslim who is paying worship by bowing toward Mecca. Hearing this, Miss America knows enough about Muslim culture to know that they point east when they pray to Mecca and that this man is bowing in the wrong direction. She swoops down and knocks down the killer and as she does so the alleged Muslim man tries to stab her with a knife but misses. When she hits him back she miscalculates her strength and sends the man falling over the edge of the building. Thankfully she is fast enough on her feet to fly down and forces the man to talk. After she rescues the man hit the ground. She turns over this third man to the authorities and tells the police that she is going after the mastermind of this murder plot.

At that moment, a fortune teller is looking into a crystal ball for three of his clients. He tells them that Matarajhi — the god of violent death — has marked one of their family members for death. When they asks the fortune teller to tell them who, he claims that the spirits have severed their connection with him. That’s when a radio announcement reports the murder of James Moffet, the man who was murdered on the bus. Hearing this causes one of the patrons to faint. When they try to leave, the fortune teller warns them that they will die unless they stay and finish the seance.

Soon, Miss America arrives at the scene of the seance — an abandoned farmhouse — where she finds a number of armed goons waiting outside. Miss America trounces them and forces their way inside. There she overhears the Yogi telling the three patrons that the only way to save themselves from death is to donate their fortune. Knowing this is all a fraud, Miss America tries to attack the Yogi, but more of his men come rushing in to stop her. While she is busy with the hired thugs, the Yogi throws his crystal ball at the back of her head, knocking Miss America unconscious. With the police on their way, the Yogi orders his men to tie up their marks in the cellar then dump Miss America in the abandoned well outside. They cover the well up and then set the house on fire so the police are too busy saving the people trapped inside to chase after them. However, the fall down the well revives Miss America and she flies up out of the trap, smashing through the lid. While the police save the captives, Miss America flies after the crooks. The fleeing criminals get stuck on a railroad track, but the Yogi manages to escape before an oncoming train strikes the vehicle.

She quickly nabs the Yogi and turns him over to the police. Bewildered by this whole plot the police ask her how the Yogi could know if the murder in the city was a success. Miss America explains that the Yogi had a high powered telescope pointed at the Bate Building and that when one of his henchmen went up there to “pray” to Mecca he’d see the signal and know that the job was done.

Recurring Characters

Miss America

Miss America Primer

Miss America Primer

Miss America Magazine #2

Miss America Magazine #2