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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Spectacular Spider-Man (vol. 2) #8

Spectacular Spider-Man (vol. 2) #8

Countdown Part 3

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After Doctor Octopus kidnapped Hayyan Zarour, the Foreign Minister from Palestine, all Spider-Man can do is wait in Times Square for his next move. Spider-Man isn’t the only one. At the news radio station where Doctor Octopus first called in to make a phony ransom request to cover his kidnapping, the CIA and FBI stand patiently beside the host. Eventually, Doctor Octopus calls in, and starts by gloating how he was managed to fool the government’s tracking devices to think the call is coming from an abandoned meat packing plant in Idaho. To prove that the Minister is still alive before making his demands, Otto passes the phone over to Hayyan. Zarour tells them not to give into Otto’s demands and is quickly silenced. The Doctor then makes his demands, he tells everyone listening in that he will release Zarour upon one simple demand: Before noon on Saturday, Spider-Man is to appear in Times Square which is to be cordoned from the public. There, before the gathered news media, the web-slinger is to take off his mask and reveal his identity to the world. After Otto ended his call, Hayyat tells Otto that he is insane if these are his demands, warning the super-villain that he’s playing in very dangerous waters. Otto dismisses this, pointing out that his kidnapping is threatening to destabilize peace around the world and that the powers that be will be willing to make a deal in order to prevent further violence. Hayyan thinks this is insane, asking Otto what will happen if Spider-Man won’t unmask, but Otto isn’t concerned.

Soon a news commentary program gathers a number of leading experts to talk on the situation. They include Democratic Senator Donald McKinney, the Head of the Senate Subcommittee on Mutant Rights; Republican Senator Carl Holzmann of Michigan; William Gilmore a retired colonel and advisor to the Joint Chiefs of Staff on international terrorism; and lastly, Reed Richards the leader of the Fantastic Four. The host allows Holzman to talk first and he uses his time to condemn the entire superhuman population of the United States for what has happened, pushing his opinion that Mutants need to register with the government. McKinney then interjects, telling Holtzman that he is preying on people’s fears. When asked to comment, Reed Richards thinks that this conversation is typical of America’s point-the-finger culture that responds to chaos with chaos, pointing out that Doctor Octopus has everyone right where he wants them. The colonel agrees, pointing out that the Foreign Minister was in the wrong place and the wrong time, nothing more, pointing out how the fate of world peace hinges on someone in a spider costume is something either sublime or ridiculous and suggests their primary focus should be on Doctor Octopus. Holtzman interjects, saying that this situation would never have happened if Spider-Man’s identity was registered with the government. The host wraps up the panel by evoking a phrase popularized by J. Jonah Jameson: is Spider-Man a hero or menace?

That evening, Peter Parker is at his Aunt May’s house, asking her for advice on what he should do about this situation.[1] May makes a joke, saying when she told Peter he can come to her about advice, she didn’t mean to have her help him solve an international crisis. This leads to another existential crisis for Peter, who is once more wondering if Spider-Man does more harm than good and wonders if it’s finally time to let go of his alter ego. When Peter asks May what he should do, she tells him that she’ll wash their dishes, and he’ll dry.

While at his old family home, Doctor Octopus is busy working on a new device when his prisoner asks why Spider-Man means so much to him. Otto explains that Spider-Man is a living reminder that the world is an injustice. Octavius insists that he is Spider-Man’s better while the wall-crawler continues to see them as equals. Hayyan takes this to mean that Otto is afraid of the web-slinger. Otto denies this, saying that Zarour has no concept of real fear, pointing out that Hayyat spends his time cowering in a bunker in the face of political unrest. Still, Zarour continues to push the issue, causing Otto to lose his temper and as he rants and raves, he tells Hayyan that he doesn’t know the fear and torment he has been put through. Punching a mirror, he then says he refuses to allow himself to be broken.

Later that evening, Spider-Man pays a visit to Detective Neil Garrett in Central Park. Garrett asks Spider-Man what he is planning on doing, but the wall-crawler doesn’t know. Neither man has been able to learn where Doctor Octopus is hiding out. Suddenly, Spider-Man’s spider-sense warns him that they are not alone. They are soon surrounded by soldiers, however, Spider-Man instantly knows they haven’t come to capture or kill him as his spider-sense isn’t going wild and asks their leader what they want. The head of this group tells Spider-Man that they have concluded that Doctor Octopus cannot be trusted and for the sake of world peace they want to help Spider-Man rescue Hayyan while he is still alive. He then offers to provide Spider-Man and Detective Garrett the location of Doctor Octopus as long as they do not mention their involvement. That’s when Detective Garrett recognizes the soldiers as a member of the Mossad, the Israeli military. Considering the bad history between the two nations, Spider-Man asks the head of the Mossad troops why they are helping. He explains that while his government has their issues with Palestine, they are not interested in going to war. He then shows Spider-Man where the tracking device they planted on Hayyat was cut off and asks if the area has any meaning to Spider-Man.

Later, Peter Parker arrives at Mary Jane’s hotel with a bouquet of flowers. When she answers the door she hugs him and brings him inside. She tells him how violence in the Middle East is getting worse and asks Peter what he is going to do. All he can say is that he is going to do the only thing he can.

Recurring Characters

Spider-Man, Doctor Octopus, Aunt May, Mary Jane Watson, Neil Garrett, Hayyan Zarour, Reed Richards

Continuity Notes

  1. Peter is going to his Aunt May for advice as she had just recently learned he was Spider-Man in Amazing Spider-Man (vol. 2) #35.

Topical References

  • This story was written not long after the 9/11 terror attacks on New York City and the depiction of the world situation, particularly the relations between Israel and Palestine are reflective to that period of time. Given how relations between the two states are frequently in a state of change. Without getting into the very complex political history, let’s just cut to the chase and say they are all socio-political references are topical.

  • This story depicts the news commentary scene as happening on Hannity & Colmes on Fox News. This should be considered a topical reference, particularly since Hannity & Colmes ended its run in 2009.

Spectacular Spider-Man (vol. 2) #7

Spectacular Spider-Man (vol. 2) #7

Spectacular Spider-Man (vol. 2) #9

Spectacular Spider-Man (vol. 2) #9