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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Spider-Man: Quality of Life #3

Spider-Man: Quality of Life #3

Quality of Life Part Three

Spider-Man has broken into the head office of Monnano to learn more about the lawsuit Curt Connors filed against them after his wife came down with cancer. His break-in doesn’t go unnoticed and soon security calls Cliff Arliss, the CEO of the company to tell them that the web-slinger has broken into the building. Spider-Man hacks into one of the computers and is able to find an e-mail detailing the conditions at Monnano’s chemical lab in the Florida Everglades. The e-mail details how lax safety conditions have led to leaks in some of the chemical tanks that flowed into the water that services the Connors home. The recommendations in the e-mail are to settle with the Connors family and then pay for testing to make sure that their son, Billy, hasn’t also contracted cancer as well. Copying all the damaging files, Spider-Man leaves the office and climbs up to the rooftop. However, before he can make it he is confronted by Yith, the reptilian bodyguard hired by Arliss to protect him from the Lizard.

Pointing a gun at the web-slinger, she forces him to hand over the stolen files. After doing so, Spider-Man leaps over Yith and then uses a web-line to pull the gun out of her hand so they can talk. He tries to convince her that Monnano is responsible for Martha Connors getting cancer, but Yith believes the company line that there is nothing to prove that is the case. He tries to appeal to Yith’s humanity but quickly discovers that she is just a mercenary for hire who only cares about getting paid. Spider-Man sees he’s getting nowhere and leaves, taking the stolen files with him telling her that she can see them in the Daily Bugle. Watching Spider-Man go, Yith quips that print is dead.

Meanwhile, the doctors treating Martha and Billy Connors are getting ready to prep Martha for a risky procedure that could cure her, or leave her paralyzed for life. Seeing Curt lurking around the corner, the doctor tells him to go home and get some rest, telling him he can come back an hour before the surgery at 3 am. When Connors arrives at his hotel room he finds Spider-Man inside waiting for him. He wishes he could have brought him everything he needed to nail Monnano, but the disc he copies the data on was damaged during his fight with Yith. Connors thinks it’s just as well as no judge would have admitted the stolen data anyway and calls his legal efforts against the company to be useless. When Curt asks Spider-Man why he is here, he tells him that Yith and Monanno are gunning for him because they know he’s the Lizard, and more importantly, he wants to do what he can to help Martha.[1] Curt asks Spider-Man how the web-slinger could possibly help fight cancer.

At that same moment, Cliff Arliss is furious to hear that Yith let Spider-Man escape the night before. Yith warns him not to yell at her and explains that she was paid to stop Connors, but she is more than willing to re-negotiate their plans. Cliff tells Yith to just deal with Connors since he can still go to the media if he can’t find a lawyer to represent him. While back at the hotel, Spider-Man is suggesting that very thing, but Curt still doesn’t think it’ll do much good as both his wife and son are still probably going to die. His anger rising, Curt suddenly turns into the Lizard and attacks Spider-Man sending them crashing out the hotel room window. Spider-Man saves himself from a fall and before he can save the Lizard, the creature is able to break his own fall from grabbing the side of the building with his claws. The Lizard then jumps up, grabs the web-slinger and slams him into a taxi cab on the street below. However, before the Lizard can land a killing blow, Yith arrives and shoots the creature through the arm. After Spider-Man gets away, Yith starts strangling the lizard with her tail. Spider-Man tries to make her stop, but Yith intends on killing Connors because that’s what she was hired to do.

Recurring Characters

Spider-Man, the Lizard, Yith, Martha Connors, Cliff Arliss

Continuity Notes

  1. Spider-Man makes it sound like Cliff Arliss and Yith knowing that Curt Connors is some big revelation, however, Curt’s double identity has been publicly known since he stood trial for the Lizard’s crimes in Amazing Spider-Man Annual #27.

Topical References

  • Spider-Man saves the damaging evidence about Monanno on a 3.5” floppy disc. This should be considered a topical reference as this form of digital storage is now obsolete.

Spider-Man: Quality of Life #2

Spider-Man: Quality of Life #2

Spider-Man: Quality of Life #4

Spider-Man: Quality of Life #4