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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Spider-Island: Deadly Foes #1

Spider-Island: Deadly Foes #1

Spider-Island continues from Amazing Spider-Man #668…

Out of the Picture

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As the Hobgoblin deals with a rival gang trying to muscle in on the Kingpin’s territory, he thinks about he has started to believe that the old saying “everything happens for a reason” is true. Reflecting on his own life, he thinks about how he became the heroic Green Goblin, but quit.[1] He then joined a “twelve-step” program for heroes. He only did so because of a girl.[2] When that didn’t work out he returned to work for the Daily Bugle. There he became interested in Norah Winters, but she has been dating the boss’s son, Randy Robertson. Seeking to impress her, Phil decided to a juicy story. That’s when he uncovered a cache of Goblin weapons and killed the Hobgoblin. Seeing this as an opportunity, he usurped the identity he started selling footage of his battles to the Bugle in an effort to impress Norah.[3] These scoops, as he planned, has started putting a wedge between Norah and Randy, and he intends to swoop in once she finally gets rid of Robertson.[4]

At that moment, he is using his drone to spy on Norah. Winters is at home looking at a blog post by Betty Brant and is furious that she keeps on scooping the Bugle on stories around the Spider-Island crisis.[5] She decides to stop sulking and go out and find the news. As she leaves her house she calls Phil Urich, unaware that he has been spying on her and waiting for her call. He decides to make her squirm, but when he doesn’t pick up right away she hangs up and starts calling Randy Robertson. Phil has had enough and decides to go out as the Hobgoblin to end Randy’s life once and for all. Randy on the other hand is reluctant to go out because it is like a warzone outside as people with spider-powers run amok in the city. When her call cuts off, Randy rushes out to find her, unaware that he grabbed his doorknob with enough force to imbed his handprint into it.

Meanwhile, outside the Coffee Bean, Norah has found Peter Parker and Mary Jane. There an all-out brawl is happening between rouge spider-plague victims and the city’s super-heroes and thinks aren’t looking good. With Mary Jane taking the camera, Peter Parker addresses the people of New York City and rallies them to use their powers to help stop the insurrection of these bad actors.[6] Norah then takes her camera back so she can record the battle. That’s when she is joined by Randy Robertson. She passes off the camera again so she can focus on reporting the incident. However, Randy thinks it is too dangerous and suggests they get somewhere safe.

That’s when the Hobgoblin arrives and ambushes Randy from behind. While the Goblin is distracted by Norah’s questions, Randy — who has finally discovered he too has spider-powers — gets up off the ground and sucker punches his attacker from behind. When Hobgoblin tries to respond by using his sonic laugh, Randy instinctively shoots stingers out of his arm that cut off this ability to do so. Phil is surprised that Randy is even stronger than Spider-Man. He jolts Robertson with his electrified gloves, but Randy responds by spraying him with webbing. Annoyed by Randy’s sudden spider-powers, the Hobgoblin cuts himself free with his flaming sword. Unfortunately, Randy ends up knocking Hobgoblin into a parked car, sparking its fuel tank, and causing an explosion. Although Randy tries to push Norah out of the way, she still gets hit by some shrapnel.

Unfortunately, the Hobgoblin has survived the blast and renews his attack. As the two clashes, the Hobgoblin’s sachel of weapons is cut loose and lands near Norah who is filming the fight. Fearing the pumpkin bombs could go off, Randy tries to warn his girlfriend but she is too focused on filming the fight. Remembering that he has webs, he fires more into the Hobgoblin’s face and drops the burning car on him. Norah is delighted by the footage and is about to upload it when Randy breaks her camera with is bare hands. He can’t believe she is more interested in getting the news than her own safety and decides that enough is enough and dumps her on the spot. As Randy runs off, the Hobgoblin pulls himself out of the rubble smiling over what he has heard.

He quickly changes out of his Hobgoblin costume and returns to Norah, pretending that he just arrived. Seeing that Phil is willing to be her cameraman she kisses him. He’s surprised when she bites his lip as a warning. He tells him that to be in her life he needs to take the same risks she does. Phil agrees to these conditions and she tells him to come on because they have work to do.

Recurring Characters

Hobgoblin, Norah Winters, Randy Robertson, Mary Jane Watson, Peter Parker, Cloak, Dagger, New Avengers (Iron Fist, Wolverine, Thing), Iron Man

Continuity Notes

  1. Phil Urich was the heroic Green Goblin from Green Goblin #1 through 13. He quit after his equipment got trashed during the Onslaught crisis and quit because he couldn’t fix his gear.

  2. Phil joined Excelsior/The Loners a support group for young heroes. The woman he joined for was Michiko Musashi, aka Turbo. See Runaways (vol. 2) #1-6 and Loners #1-6. Urich became obsessed with Musashi to the point where he turned against his teammates because she was more interested in Chris Powel. Yeah, Phil Urich has always been kind of an Incel dickwad.

  3. Phil killed Daniel Kingsley and took the Hobgoblin identity in Amazing Spider-Man #649.

  4. A flashback panel shows Hobgoblin fighting Spider-Girl. This was in Spider-Girl #6.

  5. Betty is reporting on the scene at a local hospital as we’ve seen in Venom (vol. 2) #6-8.

  6. For more on Peter Parker’s appeal and the battle with the rogue “Spider-Men” see Amazing Spider-Man #668.

What I Did for Love

London, Some Time Ago

The Gwen Stacy clone, now calling herself Joyce Delaney, has returned to her apartment unaware that she is being watched by someone. After she puts her groceries down she looks at her arm, which is beginning to wrinkle due to the cellular degeneration that the Jackal’s clones eventually endure. As she goes to her apartment window, the person deems that she has wasted her life and takes her out with a sniper rifle.[1]

Potter’s Field

The Jackal now stands over the grave of Kaine Parker, his first clone of Spider-Man, and orders him to rise.[1] When Kaine rises from his grave he has been transformed into a half-man half-spider creature the Jackal dubs the Tarantula.[2] Although Kaine tries to attack his creator, the Jackal puts him in a stupor by raking his claws across the clone’s face.

As he drags Kaine to a nearby rowboat, he recalls that he started his cloning experiments after collecting cell samples from both Peter Parker and Gwen Stacy. He was obsessed with Stacy and hated that she was in a relationship with Parker. Things came to a tragic end when Gwen was murdered by Norman Osborn.[4] Blaming Parker and knowing he was Spider-Man, the Jackal plotted an elaborate revenge scheme against Parker by cloning him. However, that plan failed, but his lab still exists under the site where that battle took place.[5]

There he begins working on mutating Kaine even further. He’s interrupted by Abby-L, the first clone of Gwen Stacy he has ever created. She reveals that she killed Joyce Delaney the last Gwen Stacy clone alive. She is furious that the Jackal lied to her by continuing to create clones of Gwen Stacy. When Kaine attacks her, Abby-L drains his life energies leaving him a lifeless husk. Unfortunately, Abby-L doesn’t have much life left herself because the Carrion virus in her body is eating away at her body. When she attacks the Jackal, their struggle causes an explosion that makes a large piece of machinery fall on them.

Suddenly, Kaine is reborn from the carcass of his old body in an even more mutated form. Abby begs Kaine to free her and leave the Jackal to die. Instead, the Tarantula saves the Jackal instead, escaping the lab moments before it explodes. Discovering he is alive, he thanks Kaine for being so loyal to his father. That’s when a woman approaches him and says she put the idea in Kaine’s head. She then asks the Jackal to work for her, offering him a tantalizing genetic sample to work with. Realizing what she has, the Jackal immediately falls in love with this woman.[6]

Recurring Characters

Jackal, Tarantula, the Queen (unidentified), “Joyce Delany”

Continuity Notes

  1. This Gwen Stacy clone was created to torment Peter Parker from Amazing Spider-Man #142-149. After which she sought a new life in Europe. She later adopted the identity of Joyce Delaney in Spectacular Spider-Man Annual #8, part of a long con by the High Evolutionary to convince everyone that the Jackal never really cloned anyone. This deception was exposed in Scarlet Spider Unlimited #1.

  2. For more on the creation of Kaine see Spider-Man #61. Kaine was killed during the Grim Hunt story arc, see Amazing Spider-Man #634-637.

  3. It’s later explained that Kaine’s resurrection and his sudden transformation was due to the fact that he became the new host for the Other. See Scarlet Spider (vol. 2) #12-14.

  4. As the Jackal put it he “chucked her off a bridge” and that he did in Amazing Spider-Man #121.

  5. Spider-Man fought his first Spider-Clone in Amazing Spider-Man #149. The Jackal’s plan was far more complicated than that, namely swapping out Peter Parker with a clone that would take over his life, but thanks again to Norman Osborn that didn’t work out as planned. For a concise account of these events in one place see Spider-Man: The Osborn Journal #1.

  6. This woman turns out to be the Queen, as we’ll learn in Amazing Spider-Man #666-673.

Continuity Issues

  • The Jackal states here that he knew that Kaine could cheat death because his cells would regenerate after any injury. This is contrary to all past stories dating back to Web of Spider-Man #119, which very clearly states that Kaine suffers from a degenerative illness that was caused by an imperfect cloning process. It doesn’t make sense that he would also regenerate a fatal injury. That Jackal also accounts for Kaine’s transformation as another part of his work, which as we later learn is wrong. So how do you explain this? I choose to think that the Jackal was subtly manipulated by the Master Weaver, who had been setting Kaine up to become the Other for the inevitable battle with the Inheritors. Hence why he made these incorrect claims and took credit for a transformation that he had no part in creating.

Topical References

  • The Jackal states that the final battle took place at Shea Stadium and that it had since been torn down and replaced by a parking lot for a box store. This is what happened in real life when the real world Shea Stadium was torn down in 2009 when it was replaced with a new stadium. Amazing Spider-Man #149, published in 1975 has the "final” battle between Spider-Man and the Jackal take place at Shea Stadium. This is a topical reference as the Sliding Timescale moves forward, making it impossible for Spider-Man and the Jackal to have their battle at Shea Stadium. As such, modern readers should ignore the reference to Shea Stadium in this story. One could assume that battle now took place at Citi Field, the replacement for Shea Stadium and that the Jackal’s original lab was located under the nearby parking lot.

… Spider-Island continues in Spider-Island: Spider-Girl #1.

Spider-Island: Emergence of Evil - Jackal and Hobgoblin #1

Spider-Island: Emergence of Evil - Jackal and Hobgoblin #1

Spider-Island: I Love New York City#1

Spider-Island: I Love New York City#1