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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Thor #316

Thor #316

… Of Beasts and Things

Thor has just taken down the Bi-Beast’s floating island. Soon he is joined on the beach by his fellow Avenger, Iron Man, and fills him in on what went down. Created by a long-dead race of bird people, the Bi-Beast sought to recreate their flying city for revenge by cannibalizing merchant ships.[1] After giving this explanation and showing Iron Man that the Stark International ship that was stolen is still in one piece, Thor slips away so he can change back into Don Blake and rejoin the crew.

As the authorities shackle the deactivated Bi-Beast a strange ship emerges from the top of the creature’s domed city. It fires a beam that revitalizes the Bi-Beast and causes the cops carrying him away to become consumed with hate and start fighting each other. As Iron Man and the authorities try to stop the Bi-Beast from escaping, Blake slips away so he can become Thor once again. The thunder god then splits up the brawling police officers. Unfortunately, they are unable to stop the Bi-Beast from escaping as the ship that revitalized the android pulls it aboard using a tractor beam.

As the ship tries to escape, Iron Man follows after it with his rocket boots and damages the vessel with his respulsor rays. However, Iron Man is blasted out of the sky before he can force the ship to land and Thor is too busy trying to help his falling comrade to stop it from escaping. Suspecting the plane must have crashed nearby, the two Avengers begin scouring the area for the crash site.

The ship in question has crashed in the middle of a swamp in the Florida Everglades. There the Bi-Beast thanks his rescuer, who turns out to be the New Man known as the Man-Beast. The wolf-man explains how it came from Counter-Earth,[2] and how he survived his encounter with Spider-Man.[3] The Man-Beast then reminds the Bi-Beast how it absorbed its knowledge in exchange for giving the Bi-Beast enhanced strength through the power of hatred. While the android is grateful for this, it is starting to reconsider their alliance. However, the Man-Beast tells them that they can discuss this further after they make their escape. He then sends the Bi-Beast into the swamp to find materials to repair their ship. With the android gone, the Man-Wolf admits to himself that the Bi-Beast is only a means to an end as he seeks to return to Counter-Earth to conquer it.[4]

As the Bi-Beast wades through the swamp, it attracts the attention of the Man-Thing. Curious that the android doesn’t give off any emotions it shambles toward the Bi-Beast to try and learn more about it. The Bi-Beast violently tosses the Man-Thing aside and continues on his mission. Unphased by this attack, the Man-Thing continues to follow the android from afar. The Bi-Beast soon comes upon a trailer park on the edge of the swamp and threatens the the occupants into packing up their RVs and trailers and drive them back to the Man-Beast’s ships so they can be cannibalized for parts.

By nightfall, Thor and Iron Man are still searching the swamps but eventually find the crash site. This leads to a battle between the two Avengers and their foes while the captured trailer park residents cheer from the sidelines. However, they are sent fleeing into the swamp when the Man-Thing arrives to observe the battle. When Thor knocks out the Bi-Beast again, the Man-Beast tries to make a run for it in his newly repaired ship. However, a combined blast from Iron Man’s repulsors and Thor’s hammer damages the ship again. This time it crashes into a bog where it sinks out of sight. There, the Man-Thing enters the vessel, drawn in curiosity from the Man-Beast’s overwhelming hatred of everything. After a quick search, Iron Man and Thor can’t find the crashed ship and give up the search so they can haul the Bi-Beast off to the authorities.

Recurring Characters

Thor, Man-Beast, Bi-Beast, Iron Man, Man-Thing

Continuity Notes

  1. It’s stated here that the Bi-Beast was partially motivated by getting revenge against the Hulk for past defeats. This is in reference to the Bi-Beast’s battles with the Hulk from Incredible Hulk #169 and 215-216. The Bi-Beast’s revenge scheme happened last issue, as if I needed to tell you.

  2. The Man-Beast states here that he was created on Counter-Earth, with a footnote referring readers to Marvel Premiere #1-2. However, this is not accurate. The Man-Beast was first created in Thor #134 and was resurrected in Marvel Premiere. Thor clarifies this later on in the story.

  3. The Man-Beast, disguised as the Hate-Monger, clashed with Spider-Man in Peter Parker, the Spectacular Spider-Man #12-15.

  4. Little does the Man-Beast know is that Counter-Earth has since been taken from the solar system and contained by the Beyonders as we saw in Marvel Two-In-One #63.

Thor #315

Thor #315

Thor #317

Thor #317