64705678_10157722991506490_777492954360053760_o.jpg

Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Amazing Spider-Man #648

Amazing Spider-Man #648

Big Time

Spider-Man is leading his fellow Avengers into battle against the gigantic octo-mechs created by Doctor Octopus that are terrorizing the city. Since this is one of Spider-Man’s foes, the Avengers take their cue from the web-slinger and he points out the various weaknesses of these octo-bots. When one of the massive robots begins toppling, Spider-Man swings in to rescue a man who is in its path. The ungreatful citizen then accuses Spider-Man of stealing his wallet, making Spider-Man sarcastically ask New York to never change.

While at Gracie Mansion, mayor J. Jonah Jameson is surrounded by a security detail decked out in Mandroid armor. He is screaming at the governor over the phone to send the National Guard when his security detail convinces Jonah and his wife, Marla Madison, to flee to a safer location. As they leave the mansion, they are unaware that they are being observed by the Spider-Slayer who is waiting for the right moment to strike. Once in the limo, Marla Madison decides to run through the list of things she compiled as part of their couple’s therapy just in case they don’t survive.[1] All Jonah can focus on are the octo-mechs which Jonah insists are the work of Spider-Man, despite Marla’s attempts to convince him that Spider-Man is a hero. Jameson scoffs at this, saying his son is a hero, not Spider-Man.

At that same moment, John Jameson is preparing a military air response to the attack on Manhattan. As the do pre-flight checks, one of the officers on deck is relieved by a man who appears to be Captain Steve Rogers.[2]

Back in New York, Spider-Man continues to lead the Avengers against the octo-bots. When the mechs begin attacking the Baxter Building, the Fantastic Four emerge from their headquarters to defend it. When Spider-Man offers to aid them, the Human Torch sarcastically tells Spider-Man to find his own giant robot to fight. That’s when the airforce arrives to lend their aid. As Spider-Man evades an exploding octo-bot, he is joined by the person responsible for destroying it, the Black Cat. The web-slinger is uncomfortable when she flirts with him and when she asks if he can put a good word in for her with the Avengers, the web-head swings off telling her he’ll think about it. The reason why Spider-Man was so nervous is because he used to have an open relationship with the Cat and just recently started dating Carlie Cooper in his civilian identity of Peter Parker. This gets Spider-Man to think about all the friends and family he has that are endangered by this threat, reminding him of why he risks his life as Spider-Man.

This is when Doctor Octopus address Spider-Man directly via a view screen on the side of one of his octo-bots. Spider-Man points out that he just recently foiled one of the Doctor’s schemes. Otto explains that he has many plans left to execute in what little time he has left. Otto explains that this latest scheme is for revenge against New York for rejecting the gift he once offered it.[3] At that same time, Electro has broken into the local Air Force base in New Jersey. There he cracks the electronic locks allowing the Chameleon (who was disguised as Steve Rogers) to get access to the hanger and unleash a horde of Otto’s miniature octo-bots. One they report back, Otto orders them to return to base as their mission is accomplished.

As it all turns out, the attack on Manhattan was all a ruse to cover the real goal, stealing military data to give Doctor Octopus an edge against the Avenges and the Fantastic Four in the future. This is seen as a ballsy move by the other members of the Sinister Six, which includes Mysterio, the Sandman, and the Rhino. The Sandman protests Otto’s next move — setting the octo-bots to self-destruct — because his daughter is somewhere in the city.[4] However, Otto assures him that there is a way to stop this and he is confident that Spider-Man will find a way to stop it. He explains that, for years, he treated Spider-Man as a buffoon and a child, but now realizes that behind that facade is the mind of a genius, and he will never underestimate the wall-crawler again.

With the self-destruct timers appearing on the robots the gathered heroes quickly deduce that if they disarm the bomb on one of the robots they will disarm on all of them. As Iron Man and Mister Fantastic try to figure out a way to shut them down, the Human Torch thinks that Spider-Man should be helping them out because he is a smart guy as well. Spider-Man is in the middle of telling the Torch that he is not in their league when he looks at the clock and remembers the date and that it is daylights savings time and they will get an extra hour. This inspires Spider-Man with a solution and he rushes up to the octo-bot’s computer controls and corrects the timer to account for the time change. This gives them an extra hour to dump the robots into the ocean where they harmlessly explode.

While this is definitely a win for Spider-Man, things in the life of Peter Parker aren’t going quite so well. He is already five weeks behind on rent, but luckily was able to get some work from the Front Line. However, he is stuck doing manual labor because he is still blacklisted from working as a photo journalist.[5] Norah Winters gives Peter an especially hard time, but apologizes to Phil Urich who is also helping bring in equipment, saying that Peter’s been to grad school and has so much more potential than doing manual labor. That’s when Ben Urich, Phil’s uncle and Norah’s boss, suggests she get back to work on her latest article about the Green Goblin inspired gang that is gaining momentum in prisons.[6] With these gang members being released after their sentences they are becoming a concern. Peter expresses his concern over Norah covering this story, reminding her of what happened the last time she investigated Norman Osborn.[7] Norah refuses to bury this story, explaining that she has found new courage and refuses to stop until she exposes Osborn this time. Overhearing this, Phil wonders what Norah would think if she knew that he was once a Green Goblin himself.[8] That’s when J. Jonah Jameson and Marla Madison arrive. They have come to tell Joe Robertson that they bought back ownership of the Daily Bugle from Dexter Bennett and are giving it to Robertson. Joe is glad they can start publishing under the Bugle banner once again, even though Front Liner’s like Norah aren’t overly happy with this.[9]

When Peter returns to his apartment he is shocked to see all of his things packet up. He asks Michele if she’s kicking him out and she explains that she is moving back to Chicago now that her brothers case has been resolved and he is on parole.[10] She points out that this shouldn’t be news to him because she left plenty of notes, but Peter admits that he had been busy lately.[11] She says goodbye and admits that Peter wasn’t really such a bad guy to live with. This leaves Peter scrambling to figure out where to move his things. After webbing them up to a wall in an alley he goes about the task of finding a new place to live.[12]

Peter first calls Randy Robertson, who is not interested in having Peter as a roommate again, particularly because he kept a moldy piece of cheese in their fridge that he named Kevin.[13] Peter next tries calling Betty Brant, but he gets her voicemail and then the battery on his phone dies, leaving him to continue his search on foot. He tries his girlfriend, Carlie Cooper, who is on her way out for roller derby practice.[14] When Peter suggests that they move in together, Carlie says it’s still too soon in their relationship to make that kind of commitment and asks if there is anywhere else Peter can think about going.

At that same moment, Jay Jameson and his newly wed wife, Peter’s own Aunt May, arrive home at their penthouse apartment and meet with Jay’s grandson John and his daughter-in-law Marla Madison. While John and Jay have a private chat, Marla offers to help May by getting Peter a job somewhere.[15] Knowing Peter is a smart young man, she looks at the scrap book that May kept of all of Peter’s achievements dating back to high school. Marla is thoroughly impressed by what she sees and tells her that she can make a few calls.

Meanwhile, Peter has come knocking on Flash Thompson’s door. Flash refuses to let Peter move in with him, saying that he’d cramp his style, implying that he still gets laid fairly often even though he lost both of his legs.[16] Before Peter can get an explanation, Flash slames the door on his face as a woman calls him back to bed. This is before Peter can recognize that Flash has gotten back together with Betty Brant. When Betty hears it was Peter at the door, Flash admits that he thought that Peter was destined for bigger things and wishes he could move forward instead of spinning around in circles.[17] Peter next goes to Mary Jane and when the two of them realize that Peter is seriously asking to move back in together, they both get a good laugh over how absurd the idea was. Mary Jane wishes Peter luck and he heads off to his next stop.[18]

Peter, head hanging in shame, then goes to Aunt May’s penthouse to tell her that he’s failed and needs her to bail him out again. However, when May answers the door Marla Madison is glad he is there because she has arranged an interview for Peter with Max Modell, the owner of Horizon Labs. As she drags Peter away, May prays that Peter lands this job because he really needs it. As Peter enters Marla’s limo, he can’t believe she landed him an interview with such a famous scientist.[19] As Peter gets into the limo his spider-sense goes off, but he can’t see what the danger is. Twelve blocks away the Spider-Slayer continues to stalk Marla Madison. Noting the tight security, the Slayer decides he’ll need some help to get revenge and has his computers look up the location of Mac Gargan.[20]

At that very moment, at Ryker’s Island, Mac Gargan is being bombarded with sonic waves to force a separation from him and the alien symbiote. Unfortunately, prison officials are unable to kill the alien creature due to protests from various rights groups. With the symbiote separated and contained, it is handed over to the military for examination.[21]

Meanwhile, Peter Parker and Marla Madison arrive at Horizon Labs where they meet with Max Modell. Peter is in absolute awe as he meets Modell and is then given a tour of the lab’s facility located on the South Street Seaport. The first visit the atrium, where Modell hopes that his employees from different fields can cross-polinate each other’s experiments with new ides. Next he shows Peter that seven independent labs where staff work in specific fields can work unfettered so they can develop the next big ideas. He then introduces Peter to some of the staff. The first person he meets with is Grady Scraps who is developing a special mirror that can work like a security camera. This is demonstrated by it playing back Grady’s reflection from the day before, a feat that impresses Peter.

He is next taken to a lab where Sajani Jaffrey is developing on an alternative to Vibranium she calls Reverbium.[22] However, when she gives a demonstration, something goes wrong and the Reverbium amplifies all the sound around them reflecting it and sending it back with the force of a hurricane. Using his spider-abilities, Peter manages to crawl up to the control panel. There he goes over Sajani’s work and does a quick formula in Wakandan calculus to correct the problem, ending the danger. Max, Sajani and Grady are all impressed by Peter’s work. Max and the others then start quizzing Peter on various applications of science which he is able to answer thanks to his experience using his scientific skills as Spider-Man.[23] Everyone is thoroughly impressed and a positive vote from the majority of the lead scientists is all that it takes for Peter to land a job in the seventh and final position at Horizon Labs.

Peter is given all of his research material and an advance on his first paycheck that will cover the time he needs to study all the material. Seeing how much he is getting paid comes as a shock and a surprise to Peter. He web-slings across town to celebrate landing his dream job and the fact that it finally seems like he’s getting his life back in order. As he begins studying, Peter can’t think of anything that could spoil his mood right now.

At that same moment, at Fisk Tower, the Kingpin is given a report by Montana. He has received word from their people inside Horizon Labs and they report back on the failed experiment on Reverbium. However, Wilson Fisk sees a potential weapon in this failure none the less. The job to steal this metal is still on and the Kingpin meets with the man he specifically hired for this job, Roderick Kingsley, aka the Hobgoblin![24]

Recurring Characters

Spider-Man, Sinister Six (Doctor Octopus, Chameleon Electro, Mysterio, Rhino, Sandman), Avengers (Captain America, Hawkeye, Iron Man, Spider-Woman, Thor, Wolverine), Black Cat, Fantastic Four (Mister Fantastic, Invisible Woman, Human Torch, Thing), Aunt May, Jay Jameson, J. Jonah Jameson, John Jameson, Marla Madison, Ben Urich, Phil Urich, Norah Winters, Joe Robertson, Randy Robertson, Michele Gonzales, Carlie Cooper, Flash Thompson, Betty Brant, Mary Jane Watson, Max Modell, Grady Scraps, Sajani Jaffrey, Spider-Slayer, Venom, Kingpin, Montana, Hobgoblin (Daniel Kingsley)

Continuity Notes

  1. Jonah and Marla’s marriage has been strained since Marla sold the Daily Bugle to Dexter Bennett in Amazing Spider-Man #547 after Jonah suffered a heart attack.

  2. It’s actually the Chameleon. However, he does mention how the real Steve Rogers once hired John to be his personal pilot. This was from Captain America #358-408.

  3. There is a bit of Doctor Octopus lore on display here. The facts:

    • Spider-Man mentions that they just recently fought. That was in Amazing Spider-Man #642-646 when Otto attempted to kidnap Stanley Osborn.

    • Otto’s comment about having “little time left” is a reference to the fact that after all of the years of brain injuries have left his body a withered husk. His degeneration began in Amazing Spider-Man #600. The gift Otto speaks of here is when he tried to take complete control of New York in that same issue.

    • Spider-Man makes a reference to the fact that Doctor Octopus once called himself the Master Planner. That was in Amazing Spider-Man #32-33.

  4. For more on the Sandman’s daughter, Kemia, see Amazing Spider-Man #615-616.

  5. Peter was recently fired from his job as a photographer for city hall after he doctored a photo showing J. Jonah Jameson attacking the Vulture. Jameson publicly fired him resulting in his getting blacklisted. See Amazing Spider-Man #623-624.

  6. Norman Osborn has been incarcerated since a failed coup on Asgard in Siege #1-4. Since then, he has been a source of inspiration for prisoners as seen in Amazing Spider-Man #647 when it was revealed that Vin Gonzales was one of Norman’s followers.

  7. Norah investigated Norman Osborn’s American Son program while he was still the head of HAMMER and the Avengers in Amazing Spider-Man #595-599. She was forced to bury the story when Osborn threatened her life.

  8. Phil Urich operated as a heroic Green Goblin from Green Goblin #1-13. He was forced to retire from that role after most of his equipment was damaged during the Onslaught event.

  9. As mentioned above, Marla Madison sold the Daily Bugle to Dexter Bennett in Amazing Spider-Man #547. Bennett ran the business into the ground and the original building was later destroyed by Electro in Amazing Spider-Man #614. Sidebar: The Front Line was formed in Civil War: Front Line #11, when Ben Urich was fired from the Bugle over an investigation into Tony Stark’s financial benefits for supporting the Super-Human Registration Act.

  10. From Amazing Spider-Man #547 to 588 officers in the NYPD were involved in a conspiracy to frame Spider-Man for murders by planting spider-tracers on the bodies. Vin Gonzales, Peter Parker’s roommate at the time, was involved and when Carlie Cooper exposed the crime, he was the star witness. Michele came to New York in Amazing Spider-Man Extra! #3 to represent her brother. She moved into his apartment leading to a tense relationship between her and Peter partially thanks to the fact that he was consistently unemployed and behind on rent.

  11. Peter mutters how he was bust with the Avengers fighting Kang the Conqueror across the timestream. That was in Avengers (vol. 4) #1-6.

  12. Peter mentions how not all of the Avengers know his identity and that the Fantastic Four are currently in the Negative Zone:

    • After the memories of Peter Parker’s secret identity were erased circa Amazing Spider-Man #545, he has been very careful with whom he shares his identity with.

    • Peter shared his identity with a number of the Avengers in New Avengers #51. This includes Ms. Marvel, Spider-Woman, Luke Cage, Wolverine, Captain America (Barnes), Hawkeye, and Mockingbird. This leaves members of the (then) current roster who don’t know his secret which includes: Thor, Iron Man, Maria Hill, and Protector.

    • Spider-Man re-revealed his identity to the Fantastic Four in Amazing Spider-Man #591-592.

    • The Fantastic Four being busy is an understatement as this story is occurring during the Three story arc in Fantastic Four #583-586.

  13. True story! Peter and Randy Robertson lived together from Peter Parker: Spider-Man #18 until Amazing Spider-Man Annual 2001.

  14. This story points out that there was a sign-up sheet in Amazing Spider-Man #630 for roller derby. I’ll take their word for it because I don’t feel like looking myself :P

  15. John apologizes for missing his grandfather’s wedding. Jay married May Parker in Amazing Spider-Man #600.

  16. Flash Thompson lost his legs while serving in the military as seen in Amazing Spider-Man #574.

  17. Betty and Flash have had a on-again-off-again relationship that goes back years. The first time they started dating was in Spectacular Spider-Man #98 while Betty was still married to her late husband, Ned Leeds.

  18. Peter and Mary Jane had been living together almost consistently from Amazing Spider-Man #298 until they broke up circa Amazing Spider-Man #545.

  19. Marla takes offense that nobody remembers she is a scientist, reminding Peter that she invented Spider-Slayers. This is true, J. Jonah Jameson first met Marla Madison when he hired her to construct a new Spider-Slayer robot in Amazing Spider-Man #162. This robot first battled Spider-Man in issue #166 of that series.

  20. Mac Gargan has had a hate on for the Jameson for family for years after Jonah funded the experiment that turned him into the Scorpion in Amazing Spider-Man #20.

  21. This is setting up things for Flash Thompson becoming Agent Venom. See Amazing Spider-Man #564.

  22. At the time of this story, the Black Panther had made all the Vibranium on Earth inert in Doomwar #1-6. This will remain the status quo until the universal reset caused by following Secret Wars #1-9.

  23. The examples of Spider-Man using science in his crime fighting are:

    • When he used a magnetic inverter to disable the Vulture’s wings in Amazing Spider-Man #2.

    • Using water to defeat the two-dimensional foe known as Paper Doll in Amazing Spider-Man #561.

    • Lastly, discovering that the Venom symbiote was vulnerable to fire and sonics, which Peter learned in Amazing Spider-Man #258. However, that last bit was a discovery made by Mister Fantastic, but I digress.

  24. This isn’t Roderick Kingsley, the original Hobgoblin, but his brother Daniel. As explained in Spider-Man: Hobgoblin Lives #1-3, Daniel often took on the Hobgoblin identity to sow confusion for those trying to learn the Goblin’s identity. We’ll learn that this is Daniel in Amazing Spider-Man #696.

Topical References

  • This story is stated as happening on the first Sunday in November, which — at the time of publication — was when the United States initiated daylights savings time. However, when and if the United States participates in this changes from time to time, and as such the specific month and day of the year should be considered topical. For example daylights savings time used to be in October until 2005 when the US government pushed it ahead a month. As I write these (September 2020) there have been a number of American states that have implemented their own metric for DLST or outright scrapped it because it is no longer practical to have in that region.

  • Dated pop-culture references: Snooki, Bill Gates, Pixar, Apple, Willy Wonka, Team Jacob

The Girl’s All Right With Me…

During the battle with Doctor Octopus’ octo-bots, Spider-Girl keeps her followers on social media up to date on her efforts to help people. When she witnesses Spider-Man getting knocked into an in ground pool, she helps him out before he drowns. Spider-Man thanks her for the save and after stopping some looters, Spider-Girl admits that the giant marauding octo-bots are very out of her league.[1]

Spider-Man decides that this is a learning opportunity for the novice hero and tells Spider-Girl that even the most powerful heroes out there find themselves in situations that are way over their head. That’s when the balcony of the pool breaks sending concrete and gallons of water falling to the street below. Spider-Girl swings down and pushes a girl out of the way, but breaks her leg in the process. The girl needs medical attention, so Spider-Man distracts the nearby octo-bot while Spider-Girl gets the young woman to a nearby ambulance. She is grateful for Spider-Girl saving her life, telling Anya that the broken leg is nothing when considering the fact that she is still alive.

Spider-Girl then goes back onto the streets where she deals with looters and other crooks taking advantage of the chaos. Her encounter with Spider-Man earlier has taught her that there is always something you can do to help in a crisis.

Recurring Characters

Spider-Girl, Spider-Man

Continuity Notes

  1. Spider-Man asks Spider-Girl what he should be calling her. Anya Corazon started her career in costumed heroics under the name Araña starting in Amazing Fantasy (vol. 2) #1. However, she recently changed costumes in Amazing Spider-Man #637. Since then, everyone started calling her Spider-Girl. Anya decided to just accept that name in Young Allies (vol. 2) #5.

Topical Referecnes

  • Spider-Girl is updating her followers on Twitter. This should be considered a topical reference because Twitter is a real world company. Even though this is currently a popular platform as I write this (September 2020) it could fall out of popularity making it about as timley as an ICQ or Myspace reference (if you don’t know what either of those things are, ask your parents.)

Amazing Spider-Man Annual #37

Amazing Spider-Man Annual #37

Amazing Spider-Man #649

Amazing Spider-Man #649