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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Captain America #259

Captain America #259

Rite of Passage

Steve Rogers is sleeping in his bed when someone passes by his bedroom window moments before he wakes up from a nightmare. Even though he feels like he is being watched, Steve dismisses it as a dream then goes about his early morning routine before changing into Captain America and heading to Avengers Mansion to get some exercise. As he travels along the rooftops he can’t shake the feeling that he is being watched but every time he stops to look to see if he is being followed, he doesn’t see anyone as the man pursing him is able to hide in the shadows. Ducking into a nearby building, Cap changes back into his street clothes and makes the rest of the trip on the subway, little knowing that his pursuer has also gotten aboard the same train.

In Manhattan, Steve changes back into Captain America and enters Avengers Mansion. There he is greeted by the team butler, Jarvis, who wonders why Captain America doesn’t just stay in the mansion as it would be easier to maintain his exercise regimen. Cap explains that he wants to establish a life for Steve Rogers that is outside of the life of Captain America and the Avengers. After he is finished exercising, Jarvis then passes along a letter sent to him by a man named Ray Coulson.[1] Coulson is a name that Steve Rogers remembers from World War II and reads about how Ray needs help from Captain America as his son is in trouble.[2] As Steve showers he thinks back to how he met a Ray Coulson during World War II. At the time, he and a troop of soldiers were pinned down by enemy fire. Coulson was a motorcycle courier who came to tell them that the air support and reinforcements they were expecting would not be coming. Borrowing Coulson’s bike, Captain America raced into the enemy trenches and beat them single handedly.

Finishing his recollection, Steve figures he owes the Coulson family a debt and decides to see what he can do to help Ray. Ray Coulson is a motorcycle mechanic and he is relieved that Captain America has answered his plea for help. He tells Cap that his son ran away from home after looting the cash register. Ray explains that his son has gotten involved in a motorcycle gang called the Huns. Ray blames this on the fact that he hasn’t been as attentive toward his son since his wife passed away. He wants Captain America to go to the Hun’s hang out and deliver an apology and ask the boy to return home as all is forgiven.

Unaware that he is still being followed, Captain America agrees to help Coulson and begins tracking down leads to find out where the Huns hang out. The trail leads him to a converted barn near Saugerties, New York. Walking into the gang hideout, he tells the Huns that he has only come to speak with John Coulson. However, their leader — a man named Soledad — tells Cap that he can only talk to John if he passes one of their tests, and the Avenger agrees to do whatever it takes to be able to speak with Coulson. The bikers then tie Cap’s arms to two motorcycles and he is told he will have to endure having his arms pulled by the bikes.

Captain America endures this and while he is occupied the man who has been following him — Doctor Octopus — finally acts. Crashing in through the barn wall, Octavius snatches Captain America’s shield hoping to learn its secrets so he can construct new mechanical arms that are just as durable.[3][4] Not wanting to lose his trademark weapon, Captain America pulls his arms free from the ropes binding his hands and goes after Doctor Octopus. Although Otto Octavius has the advantage of his mechanical arms, he is not match for Captain America’s fighting skills.[5] Ultimately, the Star-Spangled Avenger manages to subdue him and tie up his mechanical arms with chains.

By this point, the Huns are so impressed with Captain America’s strength that they offer to fight by his side. Realizing that he cannot win this battle, Doctor Octopus wisely flees the scene. In the aftermath of the battle, Cap is allowed to finally speak to John and he passes along his father’s message. He tells John that he can’t force him to return home to his father and asks him to think it over. John is so inspired by Captain America that he eventually returns home, promising to his father that he will come back to work at the family garage to earn back the money he stole.

Three days later, Captain America is at Avengers Mansion when Jarvis tells him that there is a guest at the door to see him. It turns out to be John Coulson who has come to thank Cap for convincing him to turn his life around. As thanks, John has built Captain America a custom motorcycle, saying that he wanted to repay the debt he owed. Cap is reluctant to accept the gift, but thanks John for his hard work.

Recurring Characters

Captain America, Doctor Octopus, Beast, Edwin Jarvis

Continuity Notes

  1. Ray Coulson is stated as having fought with Captain America during World War II. This becomes increasingly difficult due to the Sliding Timescale (see Topical References below). As yet Marvel has not explained how Ray could still be alive. See below for more details.

  2. This story refers to Captain America being in suspended animation for decades until he was revived in the present day. That happened in Avengers #4. The narrative here states that Steve has been 20 years since Steve was freed. This is a topical reference (see Topical References below), per the Sliding Timescale it’s actually been about five years between Avengers #4 and this story.

  3. Doctor Octopus mentions how he has had issues with his arms being damaged in recent history. He is referring to the events of Spectacular Spider-Man Annual #1 and Daredevil #165.

  4. The composition of Captain America’s shield is not given here. It’s later revealed in Captain America #303 that it is comprised of a fusion of Vibranium and Adamantium.

  5. Doctor Octopus suffers a number of blows to the head in this battle. These blows contribute to severe brain damage that will caused Doctor Octopus to become a withered husk. See Amazing Spider-Man #600 for the details.

Topical References

  • This story states that World War II happened forty years prior to this story. This should be considered a topical reference due to the fact that the Sliding Timescale pushes the Modern Age of the Marvel Universe in time. This causes the gulf of time between the end of World War II and the start of the Modern Age to grow as time moves on. Click here for more on that.

  • The narrative of this story states that Captain America was in suspended animation for 2 decades before being revived. This is no longer accurate and should be considered topical. The narrative explains things as though the Modern Age of the Marvel Universe is happening in real time. This causes some issues at is suggests that Captain America had been thawed out for about 20 years. This would unintentionally age the character even worse. This story was written during a time where the Sliding Timescale was still being figured out and not all writers adhered to it at this point in Marvel’s publication history (some writers still don’t, but I digress).

How Can Ray Coulson Could Still Be Alive?

This is another story where Captain America reconnects with somebody from World War II. While the idea that Ray Coulson still being young enough to work as a mechanic and have a teenaged son was possible when this story was published in 1981, it has now become an impossibility due to the Sliding Timescale. At the time of this writing (November, 2021), Ray would now be a senior citizen and his young son in his middle age, making the family dynamics in this story an impossibility.

Marvel has yet to provide an official explanation for this particular instance. Usually, a character’s continued vitality in the modern age is explained as being due to a method of slowing, retarding, or outright stopping the aging process through one means or another. However, for a one-off character like Ray Coulson — who is portrayed as a military courier during World War II and a mechanic in civilian life — it seems incredibly unlikely that he would have been given access to such means of prolonging his life. The guy is no Nick Fury is what I’m saying.

If I were to make a presumption on a work around here, I think the key connection here is the fact that a man named Ray Coulson lent Captain America his motorcycle during World War II. One could assume that the Ray Coulson in the present day is a descendant of the one Captain America met in the war (even named after the wartime Coulson) and remembering how his family member helped Cap during the war reached out with Cap to help with his son. Captain America is the type of guy who would have felt that he owed the Coulson family a debt after Ray Coulson helped him during the Big One, so this makes some kind of logical sense.

Captain America #258

Captain America #258

Captain America #260

Captain America #260