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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Captain America #279

Captain America #279

Of Monsters and Men

While Captain America was off fighting Baron Zemo, the shapeshifting mutate known as Primus had assumed the life of Steve Rogers as part of their revenge scheme against the hero. After dealing with Zemo, Cap races back to Brooklyn where he confronts Primus — still posing as Rogers — while out at a diner with his girlfriend, Bernie Rosenthal.

Bernie can’t understand how Steve Rogers and Captain America can be in the same room.[1] Primus takes advantage of this confusion by claiming the real Captain America is really the Chameleon in disguise. However, Primus quickly ends this deception after he defeats Captain America in hand-to-hand combat. Reverting back to his true form, Primus carries Bernie outside. When Cap tries to stop Primus from escaping, the shapeshifter assumes the form of Doughboy — another creationg of Arnim Zola — and flies away with Bernie as his prisoner.[2]

Desperate to find Bernie before anything happens to her, Captain America races to Avengers Mansion. There, Iron Man gets down to work on a brainwave device that will allow Cap to track down Primus. It’s here that Steve is contacted by Nick Fury who has reached out to tell Steve that Arnie Roth’s boyfriend Michael had just died.[3] When Iron Man tries to offer his condolences, Steve tells him to save it and goes back on the hunt for Primus.

Meanwhile, at a mansion on the Upper East Side, Mrs. Burns is sitting down to breakfast when she is told by the maid that her husband had been up working all night. Warned that was not good for Mr. Burns’ health, his wife goes looking for him and is horrified to find him dead in his study and that his corpse is being picked at by a murder of crows.

By this time, Primus has brought Bernie to Camp Arrowhead in Lakewood, New Jersey. The camp has long since been shut down giving Primus the privacy he needs. The mutate reveals to Bernie that — while posing as Steve Rogers — he has fallen in love with her and tries to convince her to be with him forever, offering to use his shape-shifting powers to become any man she could ever desire. Bernie refuses this offer in utter disgust. However, Primus keeps insisting until Captain America comes up behind him and sucker punches the mutate.

This breaks out into the inevitable fight between the two as Captain America, unsuccessfully tries to convince Primus to surrender. As Captain America begins losing the fight, Bernie races in to help him any way she can. Hurt that Bernie would fight against him, Primus realizes how he has been wrong and escapes by transforming into a rocket and flying away so he can find redemption in the hopes of winning her love at some point in the future. Bernie doesn’t care in the slightest and rushes to Steve’s side and tells him to hold her tight.

Four days later, Steve Rogers and Arnie Roth pay their final respects to Arnie’s boyfriend, Michael. Steve blames himself for not being able to save Michael and begins chastising himself. This angers Arnie who tells Steve that he is making their grief all about him and that there is nothing to feel sorry for. Seeing how he has hurt his friend, Steve stops complaining about his own problems and holds his friend close.

At that moment, a pair of joggers are on a run through Central Park. They are dismissing the danger of going into the park at night when they come across a horrific scene: A dead woman tied to a lamp post whose body is being picked at by crows. Watching from the nearby bushes is the Scarecrow who is letting the world know that he is back and this time he is out for blood.

Recurring Characters

Captain America, Primus, Bernie Rosenthal, Iron Man, Nick Fury, Arnie Roth, Scarecrow

Continuity Notes

  1. Bernie had just recently discovered Steve’s secret identity in Captain America #275-276.

  2. For more on the creator of Primus and Doughboy check out Captain America #206-212.

  3. Michael Bach was used as a pawn against Captain America and had his mind transferred into a mutate creature in both Captain America #270 and 277. In the latter instance, the creature was savagely maimed by Vermin causing psychic feedback to Michael himself and left him in a coma.

Captain America #278

Captain America #278

Captain America #280

Captain America #280