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Nick Peron

Welcome to the website of comedian Nick Peron. It is the ground zero of his comedic writing.

Peter Parker: Spider-Man #35

Peter Parker: Spider-Man #35

Heroes Don’t Cry

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A young African-American boy named LaFonce rushes home after school to tell his mother that he has been invited to one of his classmate’s birthday party. However, his mother can offer no response as she is passed out drunk on the couch. When his mother wakes up she tells LaFronce to keep quiet because she is hungover and tells him that dinner is in the fridge. However, when the boy opens the fridge he finds two cans of beer and nothing else. This quashes all the excitement he had for the upcoming birthday party and the boy quietly goes to his room.

There he opens a shoebox that he keeps under his bed and pulls out a Spider-Man trading card. Suddenly, Spider-Man appears in the boy’s room and is pleased to see LaFronce, who the web-slinger considers his sidekick. When LaFronce tells Spider-Man about the birthday party, he is impressed and tells him that the pizza that will be ordered is from a good place he has eaten at many times. After telling Spider-Man what he learned in school, Spider-Man tells him how he fought both Doctor Octopus and the Squid. That’s when LaFronce tells Spider-Man that his mother forgot to make him dinner again and how he was supposed to tell if she forgot to do it again. Spider-Man tells the boy that his mother loves him and sometimes she is forgetful and suggests that he get some lunch from a classmate who hates eating the sandwiches his mother prepares for him. When LaFronce asks Spider-Man if he can go on patrol with him, the web-slinger tells LaFronce he can only come along once he learns how to count to twenty and leaves, telling the boy that he has to stop the Rhino.

The following day at school, LaFronce draws pictures of himself with Spider-Man. When the boy also draws images of his mother passed out on the couch and gang members, it concerns the school councilor who calls in LaFronce’s aunt Aleisha and her boyfriend Ray. He is concerned about the boy’s homelife and says that things haven’t gotten dangerous. This isn’t good enough for LaFronce’s uncle who wants more to be done about it. Agreeing, the school councillor says he will call social services again.

That afternoon when LaFronce returns home from school he finds his mom being roughed up by her boyfriend, Devo, who is not happy that she took all of his drugs. When the frightened boy asks what’s going on, the man tells the LaFronce to go to his room. There, LaFronce pulls out his Spider-Man trading card again. That’s when Spider-Man appears in his bedroom again and asks LaFronce what’s wrong. He tells him how Devo is over and fighting with his mom again. Spider-Man then pulls out a costume for LaFronce to wear telling him that they can go out on patrol as he needs help to stop the Hobgoblin. At that same moment, social services have called Aleisha and told her that there is nothing they can do to remove LaFronce from the home to live with her since she and Ray are not married. This angers Ray who takes the phone and threatens to get his lawyers involved if they don’t do something about the situation. Their caseworker insists that he is doing everything he can for LaFronce, a lie since he is taking this call from the golf course.

The following day at school after daydreaming about helping Spider-MAn stop the Vulture, LaFronce is picked up from school by her aunt and her boyfriend. They take the boy out for ice cream, but when they get back to his apartment they are shocked to see his mother being carried out of the building in a bodybag. A few months later, Aleisha is finally allowed back into the apartment and brings LaFronce with him. She is horrified to discover her sister’s deadbeat landlord sold everything to cover the outstanding rent. Going into his room, LaFronce finds that it is empty. However, he finds his Spider-Man trading card crumpled on the floor. Looking at the card, LaFronce is happy when Spider-Man returns. When he asks the boy where he has been, LaFronce explains that he has to go live with his aunt now that his mom is dead and says he can’t be Spider-Man’s sidekick anymore. Spider-Man understands and tells LaFronce that he needs to look after his aunt and uncle now. To say goodbye the agree to shake hands like men. Spider-Man, takes off his mask and gloves so shake his hands. In LaFronce’s imagination, Spider-Man is African-American just like him.

Peter Parker: Spider-Man #34

Peter Parker: Spider-Man #34

Peter Parker: Spider-Man #36

Peter Parker: Spider-Man #36