Spider-Man Unlimited (vol. 3) #8

Jun 23

Jun 23 Spider-Man Unlimited (vol. 3) #8

Fanboyz

The Fanboyz, a trio of pranksters consisting of Duff Memphis, Ozzie Sinatra, and Roscoe Lunch, is putting together a special episode where they try to imitate their favorite superheroes. In this particular episode, they are going to try and recreate some of Spider-Man’s greatest stunts. First, the trio of degenerates tries to recreate Spider-Man’s wall-crawling abilities with mountain climbing gear and giant toilet plungers. Duff gets his foot slammed in an apartment window along the way.

Later, they try web-slinging across the city by using ropes and grappling hooks. Duff ends up swinging down too low and collides with a street sign. As he rolls around on the ground in pain from the blow to his groin, the camera crew comes in for a close-up. Memphis tries next and ends up crashing through the front window of a deli. Roscoe on the other hand, ends up throwing up on some nuns on the street. That’s when an NYPD helicopter arrives and tells Lunch to step back from the ledge of the building. Unable to hear them, Roscoe accidentally fires his grappling hook at the rear tail rotor of the chopper and gets tangled up in it. Thankfully, Spider-Man arrives on the scene in time to web up the helicopter before it can crash and catch Roscoe before he can fall to his death.

Realizing that these idiots were putting their lives at risk for fun, Spider-Man webs them up for the authorities and swings off. Before he is hauled off by the cops, Duff shows viewers a preview of their next episode which features Ozzie trying to imitate the Silver Surfer by skydiving out of an airplane on a surfboard.

Recurring Characters

Spider-Man

Topical References

The Fanboyz is a parody of Jackass, a reality show that ran on MTV from 2000 to 2002. The franchise also spawned 4 movies with a 5th one on the way as I write this in June 2020.

Everything

Mary Jane is in San Francisco for a photoshoot near the Golden Gate Bridge. After the shoot is over, Mary Jane meets up with Peter Parker. The pair are debating on where to go sight-seeing first when suddenly Peter’s spider-sense begins going off. That’s when the area is struck by an earthquake. Once the shaking stops, Peter makes sure Mary Jane is okay before going off as Spider-Man to see what he can help those afflicted by the quake.

On the Golden Gate bridge, Spider-Man saves a painter who has fallen off one of the arches. Swinging down to the lower part of the bridge he helps a police officer free a woman trapped inside her car who was knocked out when he car collided with another. Swinging the injured woman into the city, he leaves her in the care of some paramedics at the hospital, which is partially collapsed from the quake. One of the women on the scene tells Spider-Man that her husband ran into the building to try and rescue their newborn child. Spider-Man swings inside and finds the man, who has been mortally wounded shielding his infant from falling debris. Removing the rubble, Spider-Man is handed the child before the father dies of his injuries. Spider-Man swings outside with the baby and gives him to paramedics. He then has the difficult task of telling the woman that her husband didn’t make it out alive. This hits Spider-Man pretty hard and after telling the woman the bad news he sits on the curb to cry himself.

One week later, Peter Parker and Mary Jane are back at home where she notices that Peter is still thinking about what went down in San Francisco. She tells him that she heart a report that the baby he saved, Douglas Anthony, is going to pull through. Although Peter is happy to hear that the baby will live he is still upset that the father died. This touches Mary Jane who tells Peter that she loves him and they hug each other thankful for everything they have together,